Just because someone breaks your heart does not mean that you will forever carry hate in your heart. It will get better. You will heal. Don’t force it, though. Don’t push yourself too hard.
I was trying to heal myself and to be everything all at once: a person with their future figured out, a girl who’s learned how to make a home of herself, someone who knows when to keep fighting and when to give up. I need to learn to live each day as it comes, and not to worry too much. I swear, no one knows what it is they’re supposed to be doing anyway.
This past year has shown me that the best things and people in your life definitely do not come easy, but they do come unexpectedly and the happiness they bring you will be so, so worth it. The more you wait for love instead of looking for it, the more it endures.
I used to be with someone who made me feel like I was setting myself on fire, day after day, night after night, all for someone who kept close simply to stay warm. I was putting myself through hell for a few sweet moments with him, that disappeared as fast as he did. Then there was you. Who would’ve thought that a little coffee shop in town on a cold November night could’ve brought the greatest gift into my life? You.
When I met you, it seemed like the world had finally granted my wish, and carved my happiness in the shape of you. I used to say I didn’t believe in destiny, but I now believe that it was fate who put us together in the first place.
Love is weird. I tried to picture a future with someone else once before, but it was blurry and vague. It just wasn’t right. Then you came along, and now I can see a hundred different futures that I’d be totally okay with living, as long as I’m living it with you.
My whole life I’ve waited for someone like you to come into my life. We all know that I have had my fair share of unhealthy, miserable, and abusive relationships. But this –pure happiness, respect, and love, is something that I have craved for a long time. Being with you is where I find peace, and where I find comfort in myself. It is a feeling so foreign, but so incredible.
What I’m saying is, I hope you never leave. I hope 10, 20, even 30 years from now, we’re falling onto the bed at 2 a.m. in our own echoes of laughter from our violent tickle fights. I hope that down the road, I still get butterflies when you walk in a room. I hope we can live and grow together, because you are, in my mind, the perfect definition of a fairytale ending.
You are doing everything right. Please, don't ever walk away.
