You Can't Save Everyone
Relationships

You Can't Save Everyone

It's something we all have to accept.

15
You Can't Save Everyone
Jonah Rae

One of the greatest feelings for me comes from helping other people. Whether it be by giving them advice, doing something for them, or just listening to things that they are going through - nothing makes me happier than knowing I've made a difference in someone's day, whether in a major way or not.

And as far as I can remember, I've always been that way. Something within me just naturally draws me to people and wanting to offer some sort of aid to them to make their lives easier and to lighten the burdens they carried. I felt that everyone deserved to have someone who generally cares for them and would want to offer them help whenever they needed.

Now, I don't preface this to fuel my ego like "oh, look how great I am" sort of thing. I preface that because I believe that many of us do this. We have this natural drive to want to be there for others and give them everything we believe they deserve. However, when doing this, I've noticed that two major problems arise when leading this kind of helping lifestyle.

First, we start neglecting ourselves and spread ourselves too thin to the point that we stop trying altogether. When we help others, we are offering a part of ourselves to them, we carry their burdens with them, we share in their sorrows and difficulties - and the problem occurs when we do this too frequently without allowing ourselves to be relieved of our difficulties and burdens. Just as much as others, we, too, also need help in carrying our struggles. Without seeking the kind of help that we give to others, we will only end up tiring ourselves out and that can often lead to frustration and bitterness. We have to remember that we are only human and we can only take so much at a time. In order to be better and more effective at helping others, we have to make sure that we are taking care of ourselves in the process as well. It is all a process of helping one another, so before you continue to offer your help to others, make sure you have someone to help you out when you find yourself in trying times.

The second problem arises when we adopt the belief that we can save everybody. If you're anything like me, you are willing to try to tackle any problem your friends and loved ones might have, no matter how serious or complicated it may be. Yet, this often leaves us biting off more than we're capable of chewing. This honestly has been one of the biggest challenges I've struggled with. I want to help everyone with every single problem they have and the reality is: sometimes, I just can't do it. Perhaps it's because I'm just not experienced enough to handle the problem well enough without making it worse. But often times, the biggest thing we have to accept, myself especially included, is that maybe I'm not the one meant to save them. Maybe whatever problem my loved ones may be going through is just simply not meant for me to handle, but for someone else to. We can't honestly fix everyone's problem all the time. We cannot be their savior.

Thinking like that can result in us feeling inadequate because we couldn't solve all their problems and fix everything. The reality is, we're not meant to fix everything on our own. Some problems are just better suited for other people and that's perfectly okay. That doesn't make us any less worthy or special, it's a further reminder to us not to spread ourselves to thin by placing the entire world on our shoulders without help.

I encourage you, if you don't already, to go out and offer help to others who need it. I sincerely feel that if we all shared this dedication to trying to make everyone's day just a little bit easier, that we'd be in a lot more peaceful place than we are now. There is a great joy to be found in helping others, so long as you remember to take care of yourself and that you aren't expected to carry everyone's troubles all the time.

Stay helpful, everyone.


Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Swoon

119 People Reveal How The Pandemic Has Affected Their Love Lives, And Honestly... Relatable

"I haven't been able to get out of the 'talking phase' with anyone."

The reality is, there's no part of life the pandemic hasn't affected. Whether it's your work life, your home life, your social life, or your love life, coronavirus (COVID-19) is wreaking havoc on just about everything — not to mention people's health.

When it comes to romance, in particular, people are all handling things differently and there's no "right way" of making it through, regardless of your relationship status (single, taken, married, divorced, you name it). So, some of Swoon's creators sought out to hear from various individuals on how exactly their love lives have been affected since quarantine began.

Keep Reading... Show less

We have all been there. Mindlessly scrolling through social media and then we see that post. We see someone we once saw a future with creating it with someone else. However this time it was really different. A lot of times when we say we are happy for someone we don't really mean it.

Keep Reading... Show less
Photo by Samuel Branch on Unsplash

Affirmations affirm beliefs that we are in need of strengthening. They help up to focus on goals that we are striving for or on a powerful part of ourselves that we need a little reminder is within us.

They specifically focus on positive outcomes or belief systems that we're working to solidify, rather than solely focusing action on eradicating something "bad" or "wrong" from your life.

Keep Reading... Show less

About a year ago, I began my own fitness journey. Growing up, I had played soccer and kept busy, but after an injury cut my soccer career short I suddenly became very inactive. It took years of misfires before I finally found a new active passion for weight lifting. Getting started is never easy, and setting up for success is the best plan of action to assist anyone in your life who is thinking about starting their own journey. These are a few items you can gift for the fitness rookie in your life:

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

Nordstrom's Biggest Sale Has The Most Legendary Deals On Luxury Beauty Brands We've Ever Seen

Counting down the days to the Chanel box set gracing my front door.

I oftentimes (excessively) use the excuse of my job as a writer to justify my excessive spending habits.

I needed the new Huda Beauty palette before anyone else in the name of journalistic integrity. It was my job to test out the new Francis Kurkdjian fragrance to make sure I could tell people whether or not it was truly worth the splurge (it was).

Keep Reading... Show less

Some people are so good at downplaying their sadness that even they don't realize how much they do it. When you ask them how they are they will always say that they are good, even when they aren't. They exhaust themselves by plastering an energetic and carefree persona in the spaces that you watch them in because at least to you they can control how they appear. They can pretend to be the happy person they want to be when everyone is telling them how funny and bubbly they are all the time.

Keep Reading... Show less

Mental health is not an easy endeavor. It's not a fad. It's not a bandwagon that you can hop on and off of whenever you want to. Your yearly dose of sadness is not depression. I'm not here to define what depression — or anxiety, or any other type of mental health issue looks like — but I will tell you what it's not.

Keep Reading... Show less
Photo by Sonnie Hiles on Unsplash

Whether it's dealing with a global pandemic or getting fired from your job, the fear of not knowing can become consuming if it isn't controlled. Below are some easy ways to take back control and establish a peace of mind.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

My South Asian Roots Inspire My Future Career As Both A Scientist And Journalist — Here's How

Being born to culturally diverse parents, I feel like I have the best of both worlds!

Erikka Chowdhury

To all of those who don't know me, I'm an American girl with South Asian parents who have carved their own niche as immigrants in the USA.

Keep Reading... Show less

The beaches are starting to open up. At least in Cape Cod, where my family and I were able to vacation this week. Near our house, we have a bit of a private beach, which is great.

Keep Reading... Show less

I sometimes look back at the days when I had anorexia and think to myself what would have happened if I had taken another bite? Nowadays, I spend days dreading over my figure and wondering if the old sundresses and outfits even fit. I tell myself that they do, but I feel like reality holds a different truth.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments