Whenever I scroll through the Odyssey homepage for some juicy articles, I usually read at least one or two of the articles under the “Relationship” header. And to be frank, most of these articles infuriate me almost as much as articles supporting abortion or some other ludicrous right-winged ideas. Okay, maybe they don’t piss me off that much, but nonetheless, I can’t help but feel irritated when reading these articles.

I believe the reason for my irritation is the fact that the majority of the articles are spent blaming their ex for being a terrible person while literally taking none of the blame. Come on.

Now, I understand that sometimes one person can be free of blame. There are some terrible people out there that enjoy manipulating others and are often guilty of gaslighting their significant others. I also understand that there are plenty of mental illnesses that blur one’s judgment and prevent people from realizing when they are in a harmful relationship.

With that being said, most of these articles aren’t about people suffering from mental illness or victims of manipulation. Rather, they seem to be vindictive writings that may be cathartic, but do little to address the problematic nature of their previous relationship.

In my opinion, it’s pointless to analyze just one person in the relationship because a relationship is a third entity, something that exists between two people and can never be explained by the character of one person. For example, two awful human beings can have a phenomenal relationship, remember Nancy and Ronald Reagan? Okay, I’ll stop with the political gibes.

My point is if you are dating someone and didn’t approve of their behavior, I think it’s important to analyze your behavior and see if you caused them to react in any particular way. I will admit this is difficult for the mere fact that often our words and actions create an unintended effect. If this is the case, it doesn’t mean you’re guilty of any wrongdoing, but it shows the communication within the relationship was off and both people are somewhat at fault.

Also, I think people need to realize when they aren’t quite ready to have a serious relationship. And honestly, if you feel the need to write an article bad mouthing your ex, then clearly you weren’t ready for a relationship. Maybe I’m just a pessimist, but I do believe the majority of people out there are selfish and enter a relationship with no plans of ever making a sacrifice for the other person.

And not to sound cheesy, but the only synonym for love is self-sacrifice. If you love someone, that means you should be able to sacrifice your well-being, at least sometimes, in order for the other to benefit. If you aren’t willing to do so, then I don’t think you should expect to have the best relationship.

I guess the summary would be that being in a relationship is hard, and happiness is never a guarantee.