It’s Christmas first, and you know what that means. Your cousin has probably already put the antlers on her car, your local Walmart has devoted the whole front section of the store to Christmas lights and blowups of snowmen and reindeer that we all know will be deflated by the time December actually hits, and (perhaps most importantly), Starbucks has introduced a new “holiday” cup.
Friends, baristas, and customers drawn in one continuous line—reminding us we're all connected. 💚
— Starbucks Coffee (@Starbucks) November 1, 2016
It seemed harmless enough- 100 faces, drawn with a single stroke. And yet, somehow, this cup still managed to polarize the United States. It is important not to miss the irony: a cup, manufactured to promote unity and connection, has already managed to create a political divide. And it makes sense. I mean, it's 2016, right? Everything has to be political.
Take RadioAnna:
@Starbucks Screw you. My coffee should NOT (and does NOT) come with political brainwashing. I dropped @Starbucks like a hot rock.
— #ScrewStarbucks (@RadioAnna) November 1, 2016
@RadioAnna... Please let me know how promoting unity is "political brainwashing". Calm down and let us sip our pumpkin spice lattes in peace, Susan.
Or ArchieBunker19, where first, things got political, and then they got personal:
@Starbucks stop pushing your liberal bullshit and sell coffee. Lifelong customer becoming disgusted with the forced agenda. #HolidayCupsNow
— Archie Bunker (@ArchieBunker19) November">https://twitter.com/ArchieBunker19/status/79346339... 1, 2016
@ArchieBunker19... Let us not forget that you are about to drop your lifelong addiction over a cup. A CUP. IT HOLDS YOUR COFFEE. I MEAN COME ON. It's disposable. You throw it out when you're done. Breathe, Grandpa, breathe.
Or we can take a look at my personal favorite, from JazzHandd (Seriously- where are people getting these twitter handles?).
RT if you think @Starbucks is trying to take Jesus out of Christmas with the new cup. Make this go viral so Starbucks makes cups red again. pic.twitter.com/KjscsgpAxQ
— Jazmine (@JazzHandd) November 1, 2016
@JazzHandd... Girl. Where do I begin? First of all, this isn't even a holiday cup. Second of all, please let me know where in the Bible it tells you that drinking coffee out of red cups has anything to do with religion. It is scary how many people retweeted this tweet. PEOPLE: THIS ISN'T EVEN THE ACTUAL HOLIDAY CUP. And if it was, how about you buy decaf next time?
Sorry Starbucks, looks like green was the wrong color to choose. And chew on this, folks- the battle is only beginning. Which begs the question: Is another war on Christmas brewing?