Binghamton students defined “Spring Fling” as an all-day event where you can only cry about dropped ice cream not finals, wait in line for rides rather than the Bartle library printers and the only food you will find on campus slightly better than Sodexo. How does one make it through Spring Fling without having to call your mom to come get you?
If you didn't survive this year's Spring Fling, I present you with your very own Spring Fling Disaster Guide, composed of 12 do's and don'ts that will guarantee you a safe, fun and eventful Spring Fling!
DO: Commit to whatever you're waiting in line for. Whether it's the bathroom, fried dough or a sketchy carnival ride someone just threw up on.
DON'T: Go on the sketchy carnival ride someone just threw up on.
DO: Pack your fanny. Grab your hands-free belt satchel stocked with snacks, means of hydration and a note that says, “If lost, please call ________.”
DON'T: Invite your mom to come, because, let's be honest, do you really want your mom ruling the pong table?
DO: Learn every Walk the Moon song you can find, so you’re not completely lost. Let’s be honest, everyone already knows T-Pain’s one hit single, “Buy U a Drank (Shawty Snappin')."
DON'T: Jump over the barricade onto the stage, unless you want to be arrested like the kid who stole from C4.
DO: Shut up and dance, just as Walk the Moon instructs you to. It's one way to impress that kid who sits in front of you in calculus class, or to scare them away.
DON'T: Wear heals. You don't want to be the one who ruined everyone's fun by popping the inflatable bouncy house.
DO: Take a midday Chipotle break for your health. A balanced diet of chicken, cheese, tomatoes, lettuce, salsa and guacamole rolled in a heavenly tortilla is exactly what doctors prescribe for college students.
DON'T: Sleep through the concert. It's important to not let your post-Chipotle nap ruin your Spring Fling fun.
DO: Dunk your crush in the dunk tank. That way you can finally brag to your friends back home that talking to your crush went swimmingly.
DON'T: Don't go on any rides that spin after your midday Chipotle break. You don't want to be the kid who threw up on the sketchy ride. Plus, that's a waste of perfectly good Chipotle.
DO: Have fun. With finals right around the corner, it's important to give yourself a break from studying. Spring Fling is about meeting up with your friends to have fun — and making new ones — all while eating food that would make Richard Simmons cringe. If you're concerned with your work, there's time in the morning to get things done before the fun starts, or you could sneak a quick study break in before the concert. But don't forget every generic college student's motto, "There's always Sunday." With that being said, the only crying you should be doing is if you drop your ice cream cone or T-Pain touches your hand!
