I am Mom. I am the one who makes sure everyone is wearing sunscreen. I count people to make sure no one got lost. My purse is big so that it can hold all the Band-Aids and the snacks and the Tide to-go pens. I am a middle-aged woman in the body of a college girl. As such, I love my college, love my sorority, and love my friends. But I hate partying.
Back in my younger years, I went out and about with the best of them, had my fun, did my thing, so when college came around it was like magic because wow, some of these kiddos party every.single.night. So, I went out, I met people, I danced, I laughed, I had fun, but just a few months in I was not feeling it anymore.
Now, here’s where the fear of missing out (FOMO) hit me. FOMO is a scary thing. FOMO is the feeling that makes you go out the night before your exam because all your friends are begging you to go even though you really need to study and get some sleep so then you end up failing. Not that I experienced this -- you just hear stories, okay?
So I was pretty much over going out anytime past 11 p.m., because like I said: Mom. But the FOMO will get ya' so I found myself still going out and hating every minute of it. I just did not enjoy the huge, sweaty, packed crowds, or the difficulty that comes with trying to have a conversation within them, or the fact that there just isn’t any room for a girl with a diaper bag sized purse. Eventually, after a big breakdown in the middle of a date party, I came to the realization that this just wasn’t me. College is about finding where you belong and finding your friends, so forcing my middle-aged soul to party was not going to help me find my niche. I made my decision, and I stopped going out.
The FOMO was so extreme that it felt like the end of the world. I was missing out on the college experience, I was missing out on potential new friends, I was missing out on all the fun. Right? Well, no, obviously not --that’s what I’m saying. The friendships that I had made without parties became even closer. I found student organizations that I actually love and have become a lot more involved in them. I am 100 percent a better college student, a better friend, and just overall a better person since I stopped trying to fit into what I thought I was supposed to be doing.
Some of my favorite people like to go out all weekend, and then we go out for brunch in the morning and they tell their stories, and I laugh at the embarrassing Snapchats and #friendship. I haven’t quit socializing, I’ve just changed how I do it. I still go to crush parties and formals with my sorority, but a few times a year is very different from a few times a week.
So, basically, be yourself and follow your heart and paint with all the colors of the wind. But really, though, you will find friends that like what you like, and want to do what you want to do -- and you’ll be better off because of it.
