Today’s class is going to cover a sorority girl staple, the process of designing, painting and protecting your perfect banner. Banners are essential forms of advertising for sorority and fraternity events, these crafted billboards exemplify all of the crafting skills a every sorority girl must have.

Not really, I’m kidding, but I will divulge some of my own tips and tricks and remind you that its okay if your banner makes you crazy. Its totally okay. I admittedly get really, really attached to my banners. Through the design process and all the painting and everything.

Step 1: Pinterest.

Pinterest is the obvious first step, because where else will you find your inspiration? Scope out all of the things tagged as sorority, banner, craft, philanthropy, alumni weekend, bid day, or whatever it is you’re making this work of art for. There are so many places to steal ideas from, and its not even really stealing, its more like creative inspiration.

Step 2: Collect your supplies.

Walmart, as creepy as it is, is the best place to go for your sheet to make your banner out of. If you’re particular about your dimensions you could go to JoAnn Fabrics, but make sure you get a coupon, they always have coupons. As for paint, raid the house. There is a closet somewhere with a bunch of old, cheap paint that will get the job done.

Step 3: Design.

Now that you have your sheet and an idea in your head, its time to get serious. Supplies for this step include a pencil, tape, a projector and some good tunes. Pull up the picture you want on your banner, I tend to design my own on Photoshop, but not everyone has that luxury. Tape your sheet to a wall. I suggest using packaging tape, but just don’t ruin the walls of your chapter room or wherever your choose to do this. Project your desired banner design on to the sheet, line it up properly and sketch it out with the pencil. You may have to readjust it in order to get the whole design sketched out, so reposition and re-tape your sheet as needed. Make sure you have some tunes or someone to talk to or it will get pretty boring.

Step 4: Painting.

You have your design sketched out, now its time to paint this sucker. Lay your sheet down outside preferably, but if that’s not an option make sure its somewhere you can easily clean up or don’t care about getting paint everywhere. I make most of my banners in the unfinished laundry room of my house, no one is particularly concerned that the floor still says “Sigma Chi Derby Days” from a banner I painted last semester, so its fine.

This step will involve a lot of breaks, you’ll need the paint to dry or you’ll need to stretch out from laying around in an awkward painting position. Think of yourself as Michelangelo painting the Sistene Chapel ceiling, expect you’re painting a banner for your Alumni Weekend or whatever. Same thing. This is also a good time to break out the music, especially if it matches with your banner’s theme. Wizard of Oz bid day? Wicked it is. New Bids on the Block? 90s pop, obviously.

Step 5: Proud mother.

As if you were watching your child get on the bus for their first day of school, or walk across the stage to get their diploma, you will watch your banner be raised like a proud parent. It will hang from the windows of your house, floating in the breeze. Your banner will serve as a beautiful method of advertising for some kind of event. At the same time, you know what will happen to it soon.

Step 6: The anxiety and eventual let-down.

Your banner has been hung up for an hour. You keep checking on it, because you know, someone will steal it. No banner is safe. You can only hope and pray that when you wake up the next morning, its still there. Its like watching that child that you just sent off on their first day of school off to war. When you banner is inevitably stolen by some anonymous terrorist group, who probably consists of one of your neighboring fraternities, you’re crushed. Its as if your first born has been kidnapped. Its a devastating blow.

Now you know how to make a grade-A sorority banner. Hopefully your banner will not be a victim of a heinous robbery, but there’s no guarantee. Maybe I’m a little more emotional about my banners than other people, but when you slave over something for days, get paint in your hair and glitter everywhere, you get kind of attached. I can’t help it.