The 5 Stages Of Running The Turkey Trot

It's that time of year again: when your dad calls to tell you he signed you up to run the annual Thanksgiving Day 5K. You don't have the heart to tell him no because his eyes lit up like a toddler's on Christmas morning when you first started running together a couple of years ago. A few hours later, your best friend calls to inform you that you will indeed be running the Turkey Trot because she's running, too, and she will not be running solo. Then you come to realize that you haven't run a single day since last year's race because spin class does not count. Here are the five stages of accepting your fate.

1. Denial.

"Daddy! I can't keep up with you!"

You feel like you're going to be the last one to finish the race, so you refuse to discuss "IT" until that very day.

2. Anger.

"I am not going to run!"

You see all of the wonderful and successfully conditioned people running around on campus on a continuous loop and don't understand why anyone would do that to themselves. You become extremely angry at yourself for not keeping up your running.

3. Bargaining.

"What if I just ran to Starbucks and stopped?"

You try to negotiate and say you'll only run half and bring everyone back a hot chocolate, but no one is buying your pleas.

4. Depression.

"Just leave me here to die."

The night before the run you decide that being sad and eating Oreos is really your only option because this may in fact be your last supper. Your race packet sits glaring at you across the room and you debate accidentally sending it down the garbage disposal.

5. Acceptance.

"Best! day! Ever!"

As you cross the finish line, you realize that you accomplished something big, and you couldn't believe you ever even doubted your running prowess in the first place. Even though it may seem like a 5K is the end of the world, it's not, because at the end of it, you feel like you can accomplish absolutely anything!