As a college-aged girl, it seems like I'm constantly asked about whether or not I have a boyfriend everywhere I go. Family members always push for me to go after some random young man they've met once or twice. Friends are dying to hear about any prospects I've come across at school. Kids that I babysit innocently hound me with questions like "Did your boyfriend buy you that bracelet?" and "When are you getting married?" Even my boss checks up on me and blatantly asks why I don't have a boyfriend.
I have to relate to where the last question comes from, simply because I've asked myself this same question many times before. Every time I contemplate the answer, I end up blaming myself for not getting to experience a relationship. However, I have finally learned to accept the fact that it might not necessarily be my fault. Things will happen when they are truly destined to happen—on their own time.
It's important to note that I'm not knocking anyone my age for having a boyfriend or for simply wanting a relationship. I've seen many of my best friends experience this throughout high school and college, which has brought them so much happiness. I'm also not denying the fact that I've dreamt of having a serious relationship myself. I mean seriously, who wouldn't want to be in love? All I am trying to say is that there shouldn't be any expectations from society that either push young people towards or away from relationships. Having a significant other throughout college should be a norm, but being single in college should be equally as expected and accepted. There is no proof that one of these norms is "better" than the other, which emphasizes the one and only thing that is truly best for everyone: happiness.
Happiness is simple. And yes, it's a bit cliché. However, it is often something we tend to put on the back burner when society expects certain things of us. Or we may confuse what society perceives what it means to be happy with our own definition of happiness. At this point in my life, happiness is being with my friends and having memorable (and wild) nights out. Happiness is spending time with my family. Happiness is volunteering and serving others in my community. Happiness is also the little things like new music, sunshine and iced coffee. And hopefully, someday happiness will also be my boyfriend, my husband and the father of my future children. It just is not the time for this to happen to me. And I've learned that this is perfectly OK. Right now, I need to live in the moment, ignore the stigma of not having a boyfriend and pursue my own happiness.
