There is rarely a moment at the Naval Academy in which one is truly at peace. Most of the time, there is always some homework to be done, a watch to stand or a brief to attend. You can get sucked into the cynicism and constant grind of the place without really evaluating how far you’ve come. It’s easy to let the days press on, constantly counting down until that next break (and chance to wear civvies). It’s easy to let things get to you if you let them, and harder to smile in their faces instead. It’s easy to blame this place for the weakness, sleeplessness and contempt that you feel some days.

I’ve lived that life for too long. My mind has become quick to tear itself apart under pressure. For a long time, I have become transfixed on some part of the future, telling myself that whatever I was going through was worth it in the long run. I was used to tearing myself apart on the inside, wearing away piece by piece. I felt alone in a lot of ways. In a place where the gloom might start to set in, especially in the Dark Ages of the winter, though, I have found a real sense of happiness. For the first time in my life, I found a place with people who made me want to be here every day. I have found comfort in the uncomfortable and peace in the riptides that try to swallow me whole.

A good friend of mine is notorious for her inexhaustible smile. It still astounds me that she’s always able to find the happy moments in each day. I’ve even heard stories that during Plebe Summer, which is generally an era of high anxiety and despair, she was interrogated repeatedly about her smile. At first, I didn’t understand how she was able to stay so positive. I envied her seemingly constant bliss, and the way she way she made people snap to attention with optimism with every word she spoke. Then, I made a pact with myself to smile as much as I could every day. I told myself to find the brightest crevice in a room constantly becoming dimmer.

In a changing world, a world where fear and unease have become so much more intoxicating, there is so much light left to be found. I know that there is darkness everywhere when you look for it. Things become bleaker every moment you drown in that sorrow. There are real, legitimate problems we are going to be dealing with in the coming years. There are injustices that must be addressed. There will be moments when all that we have built seems to be coming down where we stand, but there is so much that has yet to be done. In every moment of bitterness, there must be compassion. In every moment of destruction, we will find resilience just as we have found the light. Glimmering, constantly, awaiting a better place on the other side.

"The views expressed, [in this article] reflect personal opinions of the authors and do not reflect the official policy or position of the United States Naval Academy, the United States Navy, any federal agency, the Department of Defense, or the U.S. Government.”