Trapped in a labyrinth of faux monogamy and terrible communication skills, this generation struggles to find love. This generation seems to be eternally stuck in the “talking” stage. This stage, although not altogether useless, is certainly prolonged. For those that don’t know, “talking” is essentially the pre-monogamy stage. For our generation, it includes getting to know your beau, “good morning” messages with a plethora of emoticons and emojis, daily phone calls, and, for those that are lucky, actual dates. The problem with this stage is that although it’s completely necessary to get to know potential lovers, it’s definitely elongated and it usually flatlines. The talking stage changes from “getting to know your new boo” to “being in a monogamous situation with a person that hasn’t even officially claimed you as theirs” to "yeah, we talked for like six months."
Thus , the situationship is born.
The situationship lies somewhere between single and taken, in a land riddled with unnecessary stress and chaos. Just think, there’s an entire generation that, when describing people they were once intimately involved with, uses language such as “we almost dated” or “we talked for four months.” See, the problem is not the “talking” stage. The problem is that some people have been permanently stuck there. There are people who have been trapped in situationships for years!
Situationships and the “talking” stage are also drenched in miscommunication. There’s usually one person that’s just a little bit more set on a relationship than the other and there always seems to be a disconnect. One person always seems to get hurt just a little bit more (and sometimes more than that). Usually, the people in the "situationship" are basically in a "real" relationship, just without the title. By not placing a title on the situation, there's a lot more leeway given. Think of statements like, "It's not cheating because we're not officially together." That may be true but real emotions are involved. Real feelings get hurt. The fact that a title wasn't given doesn't make it hurt any less.
The whole dynamic of relationships (or, in this case, "situationships") seems to have shifted, primarily due to social media and technology. As this generation matured, so did technology, and that is clearly shown in the way we interact with people and the world around us. Perhaps the most interesting interaction between Generation Y and technology/social media is the validation many people seek from it. Many millennials seek approval from Twitter, Instagram, and the like. That is to say, their relationship isn’t really a relationship if their every move isn’t being snapped or tweeted. In addition to this, their relationship is only a relationship once they have crossed off every item on the checklist created by individuals who probably have a hard time getting dates in real life. The creation of social media hasn’t necessarily changed the mindsets of people, a lot of these views have been perpetuated for decades. What has changed, however, is the platform. People are now allowed to voice all of their outlandish opinions to the naïve, unsuspecting world.
Imagine, then, the difficulty this generation has in finding long-term partners. In a world completely imbibed in social media, instant gratification, and selfish gains, how can one even begin the search for something authentic? This "situationship" conundrum isn’t one-sided. It happens to all genders, all sexualities and all people. It is a statement of the times, a testament of the beautifully complex and contradictory individuals of Generation Y.
A testament of us.
