I don’t make friends easily and I have an even easier time losing them. I’m not sure what it is, I have a lot of love to give, a lot of time, I’m always up for fun, and I’m always willing to listen when someone needs it. I also have problems of my own, by no means am I perfect -- I don’t pretend to be either. But it’s something about me, no matter how much or often I am there for people, it seems the second I need them, it sends them running. And when someone goes running in my darkest, neediest of times, I feel this shows a great deal of who they are as a person; a person I don’t want in my life. Because it is so easy to love me when I’m lovable, it’s when I’m on the bathroom floor, crying, making no sense at 2 a.m. that I need a friend. People to be there for you in times like those are far and few between. At least for me they are. My twenties have been full of lots and lots of temporary people, some of them, I recognized right away, others, it came as a shock, each one’s exit hurting just the same. Luckily, I have three girls in my life that, through years and years of life, have managed to remain staples and present.
It’s so weird to refer to Mollie, Savannah and Heather, as “friends;” we’ve always jokingly called each other our “soulmates,” but to me, that’s who they are. I no longer live in the same state as they do, and in the state they live in, they don’t live close to each other either. But, we are always, always, present in each others’ lives. Whether it’s a move, a milestone, loss, gain, change, bad day, good day, we always find ways to be there. Though we don’t talk every day and normally, we go months without seeing each other, no matter how much time passes by, I am so thankful these three remain the constants in my life.
Savannah. When Savannah and I first met, we hated each other. We shared an interest in the same boy, making us enemies. This went on for a while. But when we finally allowed ourselves to know each other, it was instant love. In our friend group, she was the one I could count on to be just as wild as I was. She was always down for any and everything; whether that was going out and acting like nuts, or sitting at home, drunk, discussing the universe. Now, she’s one of my support beams. Anytime I accomplish something academically or make a major change in my life, she is there cheering me on, reassuring me I’m making the right moves in my life, and reminding me that I have to do what’s best for me, always.
Heather. I had always heard about Heather, and when I finally met her, she was everything everyone said she was. She was kind, she was sweet, but she was a pistol. Just like Savannah, Heather was always down to do anything, never asking questions. My favorite memories involve them, and our crazy escapades. I’m not sure how we didn’t end up in prison, or how we’re even alive and functioning today. I may not see or talk to Heather as much as I'd like, but when I do see her, the love is still there. It feels just like old times. With how much I change things in my life, it’s warming having someone who’s love and relationship with you never does.
Mollie. To be honest, I’m not sure why or how Mollie doesn’t hate my guts. The things we’ve been through over the years, the things I’ve put her through, I am so lucky to even be able to call her a friend after all of it. She’s always been the “Mother Hen” of us over the years, and we treated her like a mom, too. Always ignoring her when she said something was a bad idea, then guilting her when our horrible ideas would go wrong. Today, she’s still like a “Mother Hen,” to me (even though she’s a year younger than I am). When I am contemplating something in my life, or have a dilemma, or even when something good happens, she’s who I go to for advice, for reassurance. The things we have been through, whew, I could write a book on those things alone. But, my God, I don’t know how I would do life without her. Or how I did it without her before. Mollie and I don’t speak every day, we don’t speak every week, maybe we speak once a month, but my life would suck without her.
These three girls, my soulmates, I am so thankful for. Through all of these temporary people who come in and out of my life; I know I can get through all of it because at the end of the day, I have these three. If you don’t have a Savannah, a Heather and a Mollie, I’m sorry for you. I am the luckiest person in the world to have been chosen to be a friend by these three.
