Being Single Doesn't Mean Being Lonely, It Means The World Is Completely Open And Ready For You

Being Single Doesn't Mean Being Lonely, It Means The World Is Completely Open And Ready For You

You may be alone, but it doesn’t have to mean you're lonely.
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Many think that being single is just what you call the time in-between partners or the time that you’re searching for the next person to share your life with, but I beg to differ. To me, being single is so much more than that. It’s full of life and more love than you could imagine, but this time, it's self-love. It’s endless fun with no strings attached. You’re free to take off tomorrow without a word or a plan in mind or shut off your phone and not leave your bed for a week.

Being single has taught me how to love myself when no one else is there to do it for me. I take more time for myself and focus on what makes me happy. I am always on my own time and never rush through anything. My schedule revolves around my own personal priorities more than ever before. Being selfish has never felt so good.

I learned to love alone time. I finally realized it doesn’t mean that you’re lonely. It’s so much more than consuming yourself with your responsibilities, it’s your time to find yourself within your responsibilities and hobbies. It’s the time you get to reflect on your independence and be proud of your own personal strength. You may be alone, but it doesn’t have to mean lonely.

Being single is about focusing on yourself and living your life to the fullest. There is no one holding you back but yourself when you’re single. It’s the time you can take risks and you’re the only one who learns from your mistakes. I have never felt more spontaneous and free to do or go wherever I want. I think of being single like the time you own your whole heart.

Single doesn’t mean lonely because being single means the world is completely open and ready to be whatever you want to make of it. Finally realizing that single isn’t a negative in my life has changed my life for the better. Find the happy in yourself and be adventurous. Go out of your way to meet people, take risks and don’t be afraid of trying something new. Being single is your time and you should make the most of it.

Sometimes being single can feel hopeless and lonely but reminding yourself that this isn’t just time for searching for someone, but it’s time to enjoy your own happiness with the people in your life who you love most. Making more time for your family and friends is the key to loving single.

Start at your roots and don’t be afraid to branch out and make new friends. You’ll be surprised how quickly you feel surrounded by people. Take advantage of being on your own and just remind yourself that single doesn’t have to mean lonely.

Cover Image Credit: Madisson Morris

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To The Girl Who's Still Crying Over the Guy She Never Dated

We've all been there, you never really dated but you might as well have...
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We’ve all been there. Every single one of us. Whether we want to admit it or not, we all have been where you are; so let me just say, you’re not alone. No matter if your friends are the best people in the world, I’m sure they’ve had enough of your sadness over a boy who you were never really with. But that’s what’s scary, it feels like you were together. No matter the amount of time, maybe a month, maybe a year, no matter what, you had enough time to gain feelings for another person and be vulnerable; and that in itself is a tough pill to swallow. Now, the one person you thought would never hurt you, did just what they promised they wouldn’t do, and now you’re left putting the pieces of your life back together.

Enough of the sappy stuff. Let me tell you that life goes on. Whether over a boy, or a grade, or whatever it is, I have always told my friends, “You’re going to make it to tomorrow.” And although it seems like the hardest feat you’ve ever endured, you are going to make it to tomorrow. And then, you’re going to make it to the next day. So it may seem that the day you end things with the boy you thought you were going to be with, is the worst day in the world, you are going to make it to tomorrow.

But even though you are going to make it to tomorrow, that doesn’t mean the situation doesn’t suck. It doesn’t mean you shouldn’t cry. It doesn’t mean that you won’t be afraid or feel weird going to the bar you once loved, or the restaurant you guys would go to a lot, or the most common place to study on campus, in fear of seeing him. All of those feelings of uncertainty are totally normal, and in time, it will fade.

My friend once told me, this too shall pass.

So while you’re sad, or crying, or complaining about this boy, your friends might be telling you, “Get over it, you were never really together.” But I promise, it may take a while (seemingly forever), and as hard as it may be to believe right now, you will make it to tomorrow, and this too shall pass. Remember that.

With love from,

The girl who knows what it's like to have to get over the boy she never dated

Cover Image Credit: onehdwallpaper

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4 Signs That You Might Be A Pushover In Your Relationship

There's a fine line between being considerate and overly-accommodating in a relationship, here are some signs to help you determine which side of the line you're on.

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While most of us consider ourselves independent individuals who are secure enough to maintain our own values while respecting someone else's, the difference between being flexible and completely bending to a romantic partner's will can be a slippery slope.

Just because you're in a relationship doesn't mean that everything the two of you disagree on suddenly disappears. There are times when you'll have to occasionally make concessions in order to reach a solution, but you should never be the one to relent every on every issue. If you're not sure about how you stand in your relationship here are few signs that you may be a dating pushover.

1. You let them set the pace of the relationship

It can be hard to know if things are moving at a normal speed, especially if you're new to relationships. If you feel like things are moving too quickly or like the two of you aren't on the same page and choose to ignore it because the other person is content with where you are, then you're not giving your own feelings enough consideration. A relationship is not just about one person's emotions, disregarding the ones you're unsure about to avoid making waves doesn't make you peacekeeper, it makes you a pushover.

2. Your lack of an opinion is replaced by theirs

It's okay not to have an opinion on every issue plaguing our society at the moment, but it's not okay to allow your partner to declare a stance for you. If you're having a conversation with friends and politics are being broached and your S/O prefaces their statement with "We think," -knowing darn well that you don't have anything to say about Trump's administration and they think he's the best thing since Netflix started streaming "Friends"- and you don't interject with your true feelings, then you've just let them know that their preferences are more important than yours.

3. You conform to the way they see you

People are multifaceted and complex beings. While Tinder may ask you to describe yourself by a handful of defining characteristics to better match you with a mate, you are more than just "quiet" and "indoorsy". If you find yourself with someone who reduces you to labels that complement them, chances are that the more you're around them the more you'll start to only identify yourself by those labels as well. When you conform to the 2-dimensional image that someone else has of you, you lose parts of your identity and become a social chameleon.

4. You alter your dreams to fit into theirs

It's exciting to picture your life with someone you care and are serious about. Of course, you have to make some configurations in order for things to work for the both of you, but there has to be an equal amount of compromise for it to be healthy. If you're working towards a degree that would open doors for you to meet new people and have new experiences but your S/O has dreams to get settled sooner rather than later and makes you feel like you're overreaching in your life, don't abandon your vision for something that would fit into theirs.

Being a pushover does not mean you're a weak person. I don't think anyone sets out with the intent to be a chameleon dater. Sometimes it happens gradually, two people start off in a relationship thinking that they're compatible and then one person grows more comfortable and their will and opinions turn out to be stronger than the other persons'. Other times, you just make a poor judgment call and try to make things work with someone that wasn't meant for you.

If you find yourself to be a pushover in your relationship and you're unhappy about it, you can change. Take some time to learn about yourself and figure out what you want and who you want to be. You can't choose someone who really loves you and values your mind if you don't know how you need to be loved and understood. Whether you need a to step away from the dating scene, have a conversation with your romantic partner or even take a break from them, understanding yourself will strengthen all of your relationships in the long run.

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