Have you ever wondered whether you're truly cherished? And what exactly being cherished really means? There comes a point in your life that you start to believe that everyone is just out to take advantage and leave you rotting on the street after they found a better replacement. Everyone is selfish in their own way, and nobody really wants to genuinely help you unless they're out to receive something back.
Instead, if you refuse to give someone that thing that they really want, they will slowly pull away and eventually leave.
Nobody is really there just because you want them to stay with you. Love is about sacrifice. It's sacrificing your own needs and wants for someone else because you prioritize their emotions first. So many younger people nowadays believe that love is just an emotion, and it can disappear when moods shift. But no, when you love someone, you always will.
When you love someone, you will do the stuff you hate just to be with them. When you love someone, you will stick with them and expect nothing in return. Here are ten signs someone doesn't really love you.
1. They use "being busy" as an excuse not to see you or to make any plans
I don't mean one can never be busy, but every single time you suggest going out rather than staying indoors and watching Netflix, they start complaining that they've been tired, lazy, or have other priorities they need to take care of. Suddenly, studying for an exam is much more important than hanging out with you because apparently, they hadn't had any other time.
2. They make fun of your opinions/beliefs/hobbies/perspective
Everything you say becomes one huge joke to them. Instead of viewing you as an equal, they view you as someone childish, as if they need to guide you through your own path. I don't mean them randomly teasing you once in a while, or poking fun at you and laughing at you innocently, I mean them just ridiculing you and pushing away your ideas to problems, deeming them as "dumb, weird, or uncommon."
3. They don't want to respect your boundaries
I mean any types of boundaries...period. Especially when you have made it a thousand times clear that you want to sleep but they just care about themselves and the type of satisfaction they want from you because apparently they just see you an object to be toyed with. I'm a human being as well.
4. They don't want you to meet their friends
The topic just never comes up in conversation. And when you casually slip the topic in, they avoid answering it as fast as a crack of lightning. Or they just suddenly take out their phone. Or they suddenly avoid eye contact altogether. Sometimes, it leaves you wondering whether they don't have friends or they just don't value you as much as you may think.
5. They don't ask you about your life/values/experiences or have any type of deep conversation in general
Everything is about what you look like. What you're wearing. What you're looking at. Nothing about what's on the inside. What you want to do to change the world. Your beliefs. Your hobbies. Maybe once or twice that is sometimes mentioned, but deep conversations is just unheard of. Everything you talk about with them is something vague or something that is VERY surface-based like how's the weather or what music you listen to.
6. They don't take you on "real" dates
If I'm that special to you, how come you don't take me on real dates? Where I'm not gonna go broke in movie theaters or that I don't pay? Of course, I don't expect you to pay every single time, but at least, offer to pay? It at least makes me feel like you're treating me as someone that you admire instead of someone that you would rather leave stranded in the street to pay for themselves.
7. Their "I love yous" sound very repetitive
You don't say it when we're strolling down the avenue, but you say it when we're isolated in a small apartment stuffing our mouths with pizza. Your "I love you" is about as important as "we can't go out today, I'm sorry."
8. All they want to do is "chill" with you
All you do together is sit on the couch all day and go on your phones. Either that or cuddling. Either cuddling or....you know. Stuff escalates rather fast, but never stuff with content. Where is the effort in building effective conversations? Or am I just a temporary thing to you?
9. They don't really wanna get to know your friends
Once they find out you're with your friends, they find any possible excuse to avoid them. Of course, they have no choice to come if you tell them to. But here are the facts, if someone doesn't want to get to know your friends, they don't really wanna get to know you either. In other words: NO EFFORT.
10. They get extremely passive when they don't get their way
You're obviously angry. Don't make me pissed either over some stupid little thing. But what's more important is that they don't try to fix the issue, but they most likely try to infuriate themselves even more just so they have an excuse to stay mad at you longer. They don't believe in fixing things, rather they believe in having a competition in who stays mad at the other longer.
Love correlates to respect. So, if someone doesn't respect you, there is a small chance that they really love you.
