Sometimes we get so bored that we often times settle for less in a relationship. We often accept toxic behavior because god forbid you’ll be “single.” You have to realize that the only person you’re hurting is yourself. You’re letting someone take your self-love, your power, your motivation, and your life away. I know relationships are about comprising, but there’s a distinction between comprising and just plain out being controlled.
1. They don't let you hang out with your friends.
Your friends were here before them, and will most likely be there after them. Yes, sometimes it’s okay to hang out with your significant other on a regular basis but when they make it a habit of making excuses and getting angry because you want to hang out with your friends then that’s obviously a problem. You don’t know it but you’re being controlled and soon your friends will be unavailable because you’ve been ditching them for weeks.
2. They won’t let you go anywhere without them.
A relationship is not a ownership. If your significant other wants to be by your every side, and know your every move then that’s ultimately very toxic. Like wtf, can I shave my legs in peace without feeling someone breathing down my neck 24/7? Everyone needs “me” time or time to hang out with your friends and be carefree. Your boyfriend/girlfriend are not your parents, but if they wanted to then tell them to start paying your rent, car note, and other bills.
3. They become violent.
Significant others being violent is a sign of manipulation. They want you to be intimidated so you’ll never leave. After they’re violent, they try everything in their power to make you feel better. Excessively apologizing, buying gifts, doing favors etc. This is never okay by any means when it’s this toxic because it’s best to leave immediately. They’ll soon start to plan their actions on you, saying it’s your fault and you made them do it. When in actuality, they’re just insecure individuals who use violence as an excuse.
4. They never compliment you.
Whenever you’re looking the best, you’ll ask them for their opinion and sadly they’ll shoot you down and say that they dislike the way you look. Whenever you take hours getting yourself dressed for them, they won’t even notice it. This is very toxic to someone's self-esteem. Maybe because the one person you want the confirmation from won’t give it. This could be very problematic because you’re getting the validation you need, you stray and try to find it somewhere else.
5. They make you feel like you're never good enough.
You could fly across the ocean, sail across the sea, and stop world hunger but you’ll still never be good enough. They’ll also find something that’s wrong with you. I advise anyone with these signs to please leave the relationship because it’s toxic and in the end the only person that you’re hurting is yourself. Self-love is important. If you don’t love yourself, how do you really know what love feels like?
