As a woman, you've likely experienced some form of sexism. But there's one thing that occurs far too often when walking down the sidewalk that some of you may not have noticed.
I cannot tell you how many times I have been walking down one side of the sidewalk and a group of 2 or more guys is walking the opposite direction, taking up the entire width of the sidewalk. As we approach each other, not one of the guys bothers to make the small, courteous movement to one side so that we might be able to walk by each other. No, I'm forced to step somewhere off the sidewalk (sometimes into mud, deep puddles, or snowdrifts) to pass them. Apparently there's an unspoken rule that men must walk parallel with a two feet gap between them, and that there is no other way to stroll down a sidewalk. In case you weren't aware, guys, your masculinity will not be diminished because of walking in close proximity to another male, I promise.
It's funny that, when this happens as I'm getting ready to pass a group of girls, they politely move to the side so that we can all use the sidewalk peacefully and get to where we're going. You'd think it'd be common sense, a natural public courtesy. But I'm just one of those darn crazy feminists, so what do I know?
A friend one told me that she knew someone who was also bothered by this sidewalk sexism, so she stopped moving out of the way and nearly every time, ended up physically bumping into one of the guys. I found myself intensely satisfied by this because if they won't move and be willing to share the space, why should you? The sidewalk is made big enough for two groups of people to pass without trouble, so long as both parties don't mind slightly adjusting their position for not even one second.
It all comes down to this bizarre concept of male vs. female space. You'll often see men trying to take up more space, as in the sidewalk situation or perhaps when they sit with their legs unnecessarily wide on public transportation. While on the other hand, women have been subliminally taught to try and take up less space. We try to compact ourselves so that we aren't encroaching on anyone else. It's okay for a man to be bigger and thus take up more space; in fact, it's the goal. Men are constantly trying to build themselves bigger, and women are constantly trying to make themselves smaller. A man with giant muscles is considered attractive, but a highly muscular woman isn't. Yet, a slender, small woman is considered attractive in society, yet a man of that stature isn't.
But the truth is, it's silly. It's silly to conform to these rules that do nothing but cause harm and unhealthy modes of thinking. All it does is feed the idea that our size and the way we interact with the space around us is directly related to our worth, which couldn't be any more false. As human beings, we come in all shapes, sizes, and colors. It's all a part of genes and biology. It's completely normal to have variance and it's completely absurd to try and force that variance into a select mold that it simply just won't fit into seamlessly.
While we have made some progress, we still have a long way to go before we finally learn how to exist in our space in a way that doesn't stem from restrictive ideals. Someday we'll all hopefully be able to walk past each other agreeably without a second thought, but until then, men, I beseech you to be aware of your (likely unintentional) sidewalk tendencies. I'm not saying that I want someone to go out of their way or lay down their jacket so I can walk over puddles, but I am saying that a little respect for my right to public space isn't too much to ask for.
