I never realized how dependent I was on my parents. How I blindly trusted any advice they gave, and never really learned to think on my own. Now, the situation as to how I learned to live without them wasn’t the best. That’ll be for another story though. This one is about you and advice to you growing into your own two feet.
Growing up we’re all taught things by our parents, expected to act a certain way, or participate in certain activities without any question as to why. For example, I was always expected to have perfect grades, go to church every Sunday, always have my room clean, act on any “advice” they gave me, and so on. I never actually put my own thought into my choices, though. When I was kicked out of the house, I had to learn quickly how to be an adult at age 18. It was one of the worst times in my life, but I can honestly tell you in taught me the most.
Everything they tell you is simply advice. That’s it, nothing more. You are never required to make decisions based off their judgement. Now, of course, a lot of times they do have more knowledge or greater understanding off things, but in the end, it’s up to you. I spent my whole life making decisions based off what they told me to, and I never learned to actually think for myself; how to make logical, good decisions with my own self. This is so important in becoming an adult. Not only will you need to make large decisions in your future, but also smaller decisions. Like how many times you can eat McDonalds and still afford rent.
You also have to learn how to be alone. I don’t mean this in a negative way, but in a personal growth way. As a kid I was terrified of being alone in the dark, and I’ll admit I still kind of get freaked out sometimes. But it comes down to something as simple as learning to be okay with being alone. You shouldn’t feel like you have to rely on any person whether it be parents, boyfriends, best friends, ect. Although it’s fantastic to have these people as support, in order for you to fully develop yourself as a person, you must learn to be fully independent.
Now, I’m not saying to stop talking to your parents and cut yourself off from the world. I’m simply saying don’t ever feel like you have to do something. You don’t have to always answer the phone when a parent calls, or make a decision based on what your parents tell you to do. You are your own person, you are growing into an amazing, mature (soon-to-be) college graduate. Appreciate your parents and love on them when you can, but remember that this age is when you need to start focusing on you. Make sure you give yourself some space to grow into the incredible person you’re set out to become.
