I Am A Shopaholic

I Am A Shopaholic Who Is Easily Enabled, Please Send Help

No, seriously, please do...tell them to bring cash, too.

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I remember the circumstances right before I first started college. I had worked a summer job and just got paid. My parents helped me set up a bank account that came with a debit card, and I had just been granted access to Amazon Prime…It all went downhill from there. I think I blew through more than $500 the first night and the other $400 or so over the next two weeks.

One thing I learned about myself is that when I have no money, I am not really lacking in anything. I am content in life. I can go on, unbothered. However, the moment I have some money on hand, there are suddenly so many things I find myself "needing." I have all these flashlights, watches, supplements, sneakers, and rings to pick from.

Sometimes, I stop to imagine how much money I would have to my name if I knew how to save any of it…maybe I would be able to pay my college fees, or at least a decent portion of them. I probably could. However, then, I think about all the things that would be missing in my room if I had not bought them. My room would be much emptier, barer shelves and emptier drawers. It is honestly a toss up on what is the better option, money to spare or little knick-knacks to enjoy.

I have a problem. I admit it. I can control it slightly by creating many extensive and specific Amazon wish lists so that I can siphon off some of the itching urges to buy by stocking different items on "maybe later" categories, things I would buy if I won the lottery, had a steady income, or just had the money I could spend without handicapping myself. This listing system only backfires when I decide I could afford to buy one of the listed items then decide that since I am getting that one thing, I could afford to buy that other thing. Boom! Next thing I know, five minutes later, there are 10 items in my cart, and my wallet is three figures lighter.

I know I do not actually need some (many) of the things I bought, but I do enjoy having them. Some are helpful. Some are fun or make things slightly easier or surprising. I do need to (and plan to) work on my impulse control because, often, something pops into my head that I suddenly would really like to have. In seconds, I have Amazon open, and it will arrive in two days. My bank account is taking hits left and right.

Is there a point to this article? Not really. I just have this problem and I am sure I am not the only one. Just being relatable here. It's hard. Some much to buy. So little cash to dish out. All of this stems from my general lack of self-discipline. I procrastinate. I speak before thinking. I take on more than I can handle, and I often forget to or neglect to take care of my basic needs. If it was just up to me with no other obligations, I would spend my life either hibernating and reading in bed for hours. That sounds nice.

I could just try winning the lottery.

It took me too long and too much energy just to write this article.

I figure that trying to address my compulsive buying would be like treating a symptom of a much more expansive and underlying problem of self-indulgence and the lack of control over many aspects of my life. I should focus my attention on the root of all my issues…but that is so much work…

Maybe later.

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13 Summer Struggles Only Thick Girls Understand

Chafing. So much chafing.

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Summer is a lovely time. A time of cookouts, swimming, and sunny weather. But if you're a " thick girl," summer sometimes brings more unpleasantries than it does for slimmer women. No matter how beautiful and confident you are in your body, it can bring some struggles.

1. The living hell that is shorts-shopping

Step 1: Find the biggest size the store has.

Step 2: (If you can even get those on): Realize your stomach is being squeezed into the top, your butt is falling out of the back and your thighs are having the life squished out of them.

Step 3: Realize why winter isn't so bad.

2. And dealing with them even after finding a pair that "fits"

Nothing like taking a pair of shorts home you remember fitting you okay in the store and then walking for 45 seconds and pulling them out of your butt or crotch 17 times. Truly a magical experience.

3. And every bathing suit you try on shows more skin than you'd planned

Even the most conservative bathing suit turns into cleavage-city and a non-cheeky set of bottoms turns into a thong. I promise, older people glaring at me in my sexual bathing suit, I didn't mean for this to happen!

4. Chafing. So much chafing.

No better feeling than four minutes into wearing short shorts realizing that your inner thighs are literally tearing themselves apart. Body Glide and baby powder are a thick girl's No. 1 necessity.

5. Loving rompers. Rompers not loving you.

Rompers are made with short and skinny girls in mind. Heaven forbid you're not short, and heaven forbid you're not skinny. Rompers are like a mystical article of clothing that, no matter what, always just barely doesn't fit.

6. Imagining wearing a sundress with a strapless bra and just laughing

Of course, not all thick girls are well-endowed in the boob department, but if you are, you understand how hilarious the thought of you wearing a strapless bra truly is.

7. And bralettes are a thing of fantasy

Once again, bralettes are designed for a very specific body type. One that I do not fall into.

8. Feeling like you need to constantly defend yourself for dressing like you want to

There are so many posts and tweets and just general ideals that people have that certain sized women can't wear certain clothing. You shouldn't feel the need to defend yourself for wearing a cute crop top or a bikini, but you will.

9. And always feeling looked at when you're rocking your swimsuit

Yes, I see your judging eyes, and yes, they are making me feel like shit. It doesn't matter how confident you are in your body, people looking at you like you just killed somebody just because you're wearing something typically made for smaller women doesn't make you feel good.

10. Did I mention chafing?

I just felt like something so horrible couldn't just be mentioned once.

11. Online shopping for cute summer outfits and then none of them fitting you correctly

There's always the dreaded "one-size-fits-all" for plus-size women. As if there's just one way to be plus-size. No matter how much they promise online that it'll fit well, it won't.

12. Seeing tiny girls complaining about losing their "summer bodies"

So many tweets talking about choosing food over a summer body. So many profile pictures of traditionally skinny women. I'm not saying that thick girls are the only ones who can complain about their summer bodies, and thick girls do not have a monopoly one not feeling confident in their bodies. But it is hard to see those posts knowing that those women would be glorified in their swimwear while you'd be gawked at.

13. The "you go girl!" comments on your oh-so-brave bikini photos

Compliments are nice, and positive comments while wearing a bikini go a long way. But the dreaded "you go girl" comment just seems so condescending. Just treat me like anyone else you'd see wearing a bikini. I promise, I'd like to feel like that.

Cover Image Credit: Sara Petty

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6 Reasons Crocs Are The Superior Shoe

Recent debates have come to light and it's time to set the record straight: Crocs are the superior shoe.

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Long time Croc enthusiast Athena Schnorr states, "Crocs have always been there for me in the rough times, the good times, the bad weather, the good weather they have quite literally kept me afloat"

The days of sacrificing fashion over function are over. Crocs are bridging the gap in the fashion industry, but incase you aren't convinced here are six reasons why Crocs are superior to any other shoe.

1. Crocs Are Highly Functional 

Crocs are undervalued for their supreme functionality. I can not count the times I have needed to jump in a rain puddle, take a quick walk, or bounce along throughout my day without the hassle of lace and what better shoe than an easy and colorful Croc? Crocs offer wonderful support without the hassle of worrying about getting your feet or shoes permanently stained.

2. Crocs Are Water Resistant

They say April showers bring May flowers, but May actually has brought storms with rain equivalents feeling like a tsunami. Nothing ruins a day faster than wet socks and soggy shoes as you hike uphill to class and start your day. Crocs are made of supreme rubber material that hinders any challenge the rain could present. To make things even better, once it's time to dry your shoes off from the rain Crocs rise to the challenge and dry off in a jiffy, making them ready to wear again at any moment.

3. Crocs Offer Convenient Sports Mode

Some might argue that Crocs aren't the most reliable fashion statement because of the exposed heel. After all, how would you run through the summer with an exposed heel? Thank goodness for sports mode. Kick your Croc clogs into action by switching the front facing band into the down and locked position. Spots mode is the solution to all your problems.

4. Crocs Come In a Variety of Colors

In these trying times, self expression comes in so many forms and is so vital to our daily lives. Croc offer a wide variety of styles and colors that are bound to suit the needs of any individual. School colors, family matching, his and hers, even sparkly white crocs for your wedding day. There is no limit to the color Crocs can sport, and even better, they will match every outfit.

5. Crocs Can Be Decorative

Following on the coat tails of self expression, crocs offer a variety of customizable options for individuals to express themselves. Crocs are known for their accessories, Jibbittz. Jibbitz come in so many shapes and colors, that regardless of your age, are sure to please.

6. The Best Is Yet To Come

By now, I know it can be hard to believe, but the best season of Crocs are yet to come. Crocs are launching their newest addition to the rubbery life savers- fanny packs. That's right, something that was already great, just got even better. In their newest line, crocs will be adding small fanny packs to the sports mode straps on Crocs. By the looks of it, if Crocs keep improving their line, the best is yet to come.

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