This article is not about politics. Do not make it about politics.
This article is about a sexual assault survivor's story, and how she is coping with the fact that our president is an accused rapist. I am not and will not be talking about policies. I won't be spreading hate toward our new president-elect. The purpose of this article is not to sway individuals to hate Donald Trump, but to help individuals who are confused as to why certain people are being, "overdramatic," to try and understand how it feels. I'm not asking you to change your ideology. I'm not shaming you. I'm asking for compassion, because, "until it happens to you, you don't know how it feels." - Lady Gaga
Let me tell you about a friend of mine. Lydia* is 21 years old and goes to state school in the Midwest. She was 18 when she was sexually assaulted. She was the one in five freshman girls statistic, and after it happened, her professor's lecture from the day before rang in her ears. She wasn't comfortable telling me what happened to her. She doesn't talk about it with anyone. She can't even think about the night it happened without bursting into sad, desperate, sobs. She cried most of the time I talked to her about this article. But she wanted her voice back. This is her story.
When she found out Donald Trump was the new president of The United States, she felt like she was back living that night. She could feel the cold spring air push into her skin where her tights were ripped. She could feel the bottoms of her worn out converse sticking to the booze covered floor. She could feel his hands on her. She could see the flashing lights. She could hear the EDM music overloading her senses. She was there. When she walked down the hall in her home to the bathroom she half expected to see the face of her teenage-self looking back at her. You know that Snapchat filter with the running eye make up and the smeared red lipstick? That was her. She doesn't use that filter.
She doesn't hate anyone that voted for Trump, but when you voted for him, it felt like you were saying that what he has been accused of doing to women is okay. It's like saying what happened to her is okay. When she told her dad that she heard about Trump's rape allegations, he told her that he hasn't been convicted yet. She held her tongue. She wanted to yell until her voice box broke. She wanted to break the wall with her small fists that have been afraid to fist bump, but most of all she wanted to fall to her knees and cry to her father that, "You know who else isn't convicted? The man who sexually assaulted your daughter." But she didn't.
When she clicked on her Facebook app expecting to see posts about mourning from her favorite feminists, she saw something else entirely. She saw a post reminding people that at least our taxes are safe. "Too bad our bodies aren't," she said scrolling down. She saw a post telling people that they need to calm down. "Tell me to calm down after you've been grabbed by the pussy," she said as her eyes sunk into the ocean of her tears. She felt just as she did that night: disrespected, dirty and worthless. As if there were no amount of showers she could take, soap she could use, skin she could scrub, to finally feel clean again.
This is not about politics. Do not make it about politics. This is about knowing that the person who sexually assaulted you will have no repercussions, knowing that they will someday get married, become a parent, have to educate and guide their children to be good humans, and now run our country. This is not about politics. This is about people. We are all just people trying to survive in a world that sometimes makes it incredibly difficult. Be compassionate. Be caring. Love each other and leave judgement and hate at the door. You have no idea what battle someone is fighting, and if you don't feel any sympathy or understanding or compassion at all after reading this, then fine, I suppose you can unfriend me. Not because you like Trump, but because you let hate trump love, and that's something truly volatile.
* Editor's Note: Name has been changed for privacy.
