Sex. Despite how it's advertised in almost every aspect of our society, it's still such a taboo topic, especially when it comes to women who do and do not have sex.

I'm not sure what it is with society as a whole, and the obsession with keeping a women's sexuality under wraps unless it seems to please men, but it's something that, as I was growing up, learning more about women and sexuality, I've definitely noticed.

Of course, I was like every other typical middle school girl, calling girls mean names, and shaming them for doing things as minuscule as kissing boys, and in high school, that shaming got worse. My friends and I were calling girls sluts and whores left and right, for the dumbest things.

However, in sophomore year, I became friends with two girls who were possibly two of the most fun and sweetest girls I had met to date. A month into the friendships with both of them, I learned that they had had sex, and still sometimes did, as one of them had a boyfriend and one did not. Oddly enough, even after spending years slut-shaming girls (yes, even ones who were in relationships), I didn't think any different of my two friends. Actually, the word "slut" never even crossed my mind. Why would it? They were my friends, and the fact that they had had sex before did nothing to change how amazing they were as individual people.

I never thought much about it until I started getting into feminism in my junior year. I met more people, at work and school, who had experience, and while I still heard my friends calling girls names for exploring their sexuality in healthy ways, in their comfort zones, I had a hard time agreeing with it. I realized it was a problem, and I refused to be a part of it. I haven't shamed anyone since.

What made a girl a slut? The fact that she enjoyed sex? Double standards have been around forever, and even though they might not be as prominent as they once were, they still exist today.

Women are shamed in their daily lives, by men and by other women. They are always told by mothers that they should stay "pure," and if their virginity defines who they are as a person, and having sex "defiles" them; meanwhile, men are praised, and told taking a women's virginity is the best gift they could give her.

Women are also sexualized in the media, which goes back to women being sexualized to please men. On magazine covers, men are (not always, but most of the time) dressed impeccably in suits, while women have on these skimpy outfits, deemed sexy, and sometimes, they are even naked, with only their hands to cover themselves.

While posing nude and provocatively can be empowering to some women, the amount it's being done is ridiculous.

This has to stop.

We women are not objects, we are not fetishes, we are not here for men to simply "enjoy." We are real people, with real feelings. We have our own needs, our own desires, and we deserve to be able to express those desires without backlash from society, family, and friends. All women should be in touch with their sexuality, all women should enjoy it, and not feel ashamed of it, because it is a natural thing. Women learning not to shame other women is only the start to the end of this ridiculous sexist problem.