I go to a Catholic university and hearing the ever-present sexist comments that bleed through my campus makes me question how Christian the student body really is. I am not throwing any sort of shade at my peers by any means, but this is an issue nationwide—both on and off campuses.
Unfortunately, this language is really just another facet of my daily encounters with my male peers and it is something that few understand to be wrong. Some excuse the derogatory remarks, blaming “hormones,” but I refuse to buy that.
From commentary on the size of a woman’s breasts and behind, to mocking her possibly unconventional style, it is all-too-ordinary to hear language that drags young, adult women from a humanistic level to that of an inanimate object.
Sharing intimate details of one’s sexual experiences has been made a conversation-starter and, so, the bedroom has become a public spectacle—rather than an intimate experience.
Sexual encounters are a trophy on a list of sexual conquests, and honestly, it’s hard to tell a partner from a daily to-do list—as sickening as that is to admit.
Just as this type of jargon has become a part of many male’s daily “locker room” conversations, so has the often denied rape culture. While laws have tried to suppress this behavior, the reality is that a law cannot change faulty morality—and that is the real problem.
The scariest part is that so many people think this is an issue of the past—because a few law advancements fixes immorality taught to a gender since, essentially, they were able to understand the idea of sex, right?
While I try my best to shut down any comments I overhear, and refuse to take part in sexist commentary within my friend groups, I wish there was some way I could conceptualize these atrocities to my younger sister before she enters the collegiate world.
In an environment where my female friends cannot safely enjoy a college party without an unofficial bodyguard, and cannot accept a walk back to campus without questioning their well-being, I cherish the moments my younger sister spends under the roof of our country home.
Even if we are at school for an education—and what’s safer than that?—the reality is that the weekend poses an unfair danger to women. It is a danger that is only unavoidable to a certain extent.
We have all heard it: “Never go out or come back from a party alone.” In all honesty, though, things don’t always work out as planned and that’s not the most realistic piece of advice. How is it fair that a failed evening plan should result in a young women’s compromised safety and health?
I think there is only one way to explain the implications of this commentary and behavior to young men and, ironically, it lies in a single cliche: “How would you feel if someone were talking about your mother or sister like that?”
It is something many young men cringe at, because it is safe to say no man would want their own mother or sister dulled down to the level of a useless object.
When there is a face for perpetrators to redirect their slurs towards, perspectives really can change. Suddenly, the slurs have a newfound, and inherently negative, purpose besides solidifying a “manly” image.
Sure, a single phrase is not likely to end long-term faulty morality—but it’s a start. If we can at least teach men to correct perpetrators, instead of being pressured into participating in the interest of “proving their masculinity,” we might see some results.
Sex isn't an accomplishment or a basis for bragging rights—it is something personal and private. There might not be an official "law of sex," but it is safe to say most women expect confidentiality and respect both inside and outside the bedroom.
