Dear Christian,

At this point in time four years ago, you were probably quoting or posting a meme regarding Green Day's famous song, "Wake Me Up When September Ends." Don't worry, I have been doing that every year since I first heard the song. The thing is, I am at the point where the majority of your academic years are coming to an end. That's right: you will actually be able to see yourself at your college graduation. Sounds cool right?

It seems a bit odd, writing a letter to my younger self when I should be posting something in regards to my older self. However, I do not want to look forward just yet. I need to look back in order to find out where to go next. In four (extremely fast) years, I have learned so many things about life and who we are, and at times, we have gone through moments that have made us proud or full of regret. That is okay, and here are reasons why:

1. The school you go to will not be the end of the world / You decide your own academic journey

If memory serves well, you were already filling out college applications. Mother was expecting you to apply for the College of Mount St. Vincent; you wanted to go to Syracuse University. Great news: You got accepted into Syracuse's S.I. Newhouse School of Public Communications, among other colleges such as St. John's University, Pace University, Hunter College, and City College. Despite the backlash you might give to mom and dad, going to the college was one of my favorite life experiences. Aside from classes, you learn more about your culture and the things you love. You truly become the person who you want to be. It does not really matter where you graduate from for your Bachelor's Degree as long as you survived the journey.

I can sense the pain you feel with the fact that you are most likely going to end up taking Nursing at CMSV. The first moment where we experiences that pain was during drama club, when the director correctly guessed that you were going to take nursing at CMSV since it was a nursing school. Nursing was never meant for us. You feigned interest, slept in classes (which you don't do as much anymore), crammed information, and stressed out so many times. At one point when they had to practice finding blood pressure in class, it was almost 150/110 (nowhere near normal levels). There is no shame with changing majors. We ended up going into History with Secondary Education, and our sanity has never been so great. The fate you decide can change, so go with the flow as we normally do.

2. Friends are not as temporary as you think they are

When we were in middle school, we told ourselves to keep in contact with our friends after graduating. The same thing goes for high school after graduation. Sadly, we only keep up with a few of them despite having them on Facebook. During your college years, you are going to meet and befriend a great number of colleagues, more than you would expect to ever meet in your own lifetime. You actually become less introverted in many ways. However, never discount friends just because you do not see them anymore. You will depend on your friends for guidance just as much they will look to you for help. The measure of friendship is not in how they feel about you, but in how they make you feel about yourself. Your new batch of friends will keep you in check - keeping you humble and in good health, always looking out for your best interests.

3. You have to keep a sense of cautious optimism but: things actually get better while pain is temporary but necessary

If you think our high school years are going to be chaotic, college was just as bad. This is the real world. By the end of senior year of high school, you learned about cautious optimism: Looking forward to the best in life even though things can and will go wrong. What matters then is the ability to go with the flow and accept things as they are. As much as I may want to go back in time to change the past and fix mistakes and actually undo some of our regrets: 1) Time travel is not real; and 2) Going back in time will not be a real sense of closure and happiness. If we dictate our own happiness for the sake of feeling good about ourselves, then we are not really happy. If I have to repeat the pain we will go through, I would because it shape you into the person you are right now.

So. Where am I going with all of this?

You are still making an impact even though you seem like your place in this world is insignificant. Christian, do not fret over the uncontrollable. Rather, live with the moments that test you. We are strong, and we can overcome anything that comes our way. Do yourself a favor: Study hard, listen to mom and dad, love your siblings, and eat your vegetables.

If you can do most of that, if not all, you'll be in great shape.

Until the possibly where we can actually meet, I will look to you from old pictures and mementos as a source of strength.

Best,

Christian