Lately, I keep getting asked some variation of, “Why aren’t you hanging out with anyone?”
And I have multiple answers.
FEELING DETACHED. If I’m not in the highest of spirits, I probably won’t want to hang out. It’s not because I hate my friends, suddenly disregard family time, or want to avoid all social interaction – I simply don’t feel connected. It’s almost indescribable. Also, don’t forget that I’m an introvert and I do NOT get energy from being around people often. If anything, it’s draining – which leads me to my next point.
NEED TIME TO MYSELF. Part of this could be blamed upon my "only child-ness" because I’m used to having quiet time, my own agenda, and hobbies that suit myself. As I stated above, I’m an introvert, and introverts don’t love socializing quite as much as the rest of the population. I need time to myself or I will become an angry little humanoid. Oh, and don’t think that this makes me lonely just because I’m alone. Being alone allows me to gather my thoughts and re-energize. Thinking things out by yourself is a good thing, and you may even discover who you are or want to be along the way.
GIVING SPACE TO OTHERS. This is pretty self-explanatory. It is the same reason I avoid texting certain friends and family members. I don’t want to suffocate you with my love. They have lives and most likely want time to themselves too.
GROWING APART. Now before you jump to conclusions, this is not necessarily a bad thing. I believe growing apart from friends has allowed us to grow together in new ways due to our new experiences, which is awesome! At other times, though, and admittedly so, people grow apart. That doesn’t have to mean you like each other any less, but everyone is continuously moving along in life.
HAVING DIFFERENT INTERESTS. Yes, this is somewhat sad because I have in fact separated myself from people as a result of our differing interests, but there’s still a positive underlying element. When I do eventually blossom out of my hermit shell, my friends and I have stuff to talk about. Being the same is nice, but having different lives with varying interests makes it that much more interesting/entertaining/fun to reconnect!
Separating yourself from others is okay. I don’t feel it’s fair to punish people just because they want to step away for some time. Everyone is different. We all deal with stuff in our own ways and that in and of itself is explanation enough.
