There is this thing my family does after an event that maybe didn't quite go our way called a "post-mortem". You basically answer three questions - What went well, what did not go well, and what are you going to do next time?

The order of these questions is incredibly intentional.

The reason you say what went well first, is to emphasize that not everything is black and white, and there had to be something good. Even if the only thing you can write is something like "I am still alive" - you need to write as much as possible about what went well in the situation so you can celebrate it.

Then, you address what you want to get to - what you felt was not what you wanted. This is usually what you want to do first, but it is really important you address what went well first.

Later, you get the opportunity to change and make the future better. You write what you are going to do next time. I want to encourage everyone to do a "post-mortem" either for the semester (if you are in school) or for the year if you are not.

So, for example, here is my semester "post-mortem":

What Went Well?

I had a wonderful paid internship in my field as lead producer for the campus news channel where I got to learn a lot about videography and cover events around campus.

I got a job with Chickfila as a marketing assistant working events like Mercer football games, the Nutcracker and the Grand Opera House with amazing and funny cows.

I wrote for the campus newspaper called The Statement, where I wrote 10 articles and had a photograph featured on the front page for our layout editors article. I made a good friend from the newspaper who ended up connecting me to other lovely people around campus.

I have a wonderful dorm with a full sized bed, my own bathroom, a full kitchen, washer and dryer, three kind suite mates and an amazing view.

My grandparents were amazing to drop off a lot of supplies when I moved in such as towels and cooking supplies and my favorite chai tea mix <3

I started writing for the Odyssey! That has been so much fun, and a great way to practice using my voice.

I got to create an amazing documentary about a new Retrocade and Bar called Reboot that just opened in downtown Macon, Georgia. I was convinced the owners wouldn't let a student cover their opening as they had construction and set things up but they were amazing to work with and the final product was exactly what I envisioned (maybe even better!)

My grandparents were kind enough to pay for a new car once my old one broke down and I had to sell it for parts. This new one is the most reliable and beautiful little thing and I am so blessed that they were able to help me.

I was given several contracting jobs with North Point Community Church and their middle school camps. I got to direct a team of cameras on a switchboard and it just brings me so much joy every time I am able to do that.

I started going to the school counselor that is included in our fees for school and she is AMAZING. I was able to start really coping effectively and walk through certain things that were bothering me.

At the end of the semester I interviewed for an RA position and got it for this spring semester.

What did not go well?

I moved from a summer internship in Washington, DC to Macon, Georgia where I didn't know anyone or the area. So, that was definitely a culture shock and quite lonely for a long while.

My first internship that I was going to have, at the Georgia Center for Innovation in Aerospace - completely fell through.

My next internship took a long time to line up and then wasn't able to pay me for a while until I brought a second form of ID like my passport - which my mom had to bring to me from Dacula.

My freaking car broke down, on the highway, while visiting a friend in Atlanta with another friend who was staying with me in Macon at my dorm. Luckily it all got figured out in the end, but trying to get back to Macon and figure out how to sell my damn car was a nightmare. My parents had to figure out when they could get me the title so I could get rid of it.

Not having a car for two months...I love to explore and get out to coffee shops and such - not having a car made that basically impossible. I just didn't have a ton of money to spend on things like uber, so I was mostly confined to campus.

No car = no church community for a while. I cannot wait to go back and start learning how to do lights and audio with their tech crew!

No car = no fresh groceries for a while. I started using amazon pantry for some things and then relying heavily on my meal plan.

What am I Going to do Next Time?

I want to go to counseling right away when I am struggling with depression. Because that is what I was facing when I first moved to Macon. I didn't want to ever admit it head on, but that is exactly what was happening and I knew it. The second I started getting help, I started feeling exponentially better.

Trust that things like internships and income are going to work out. While it was incredibly frustrating to go through this past semester, it all worked out way better than I could ever have hoped for when I first moved here.

Continue pushing myself to do things like apply to be an RA - even though I am not sure what I am getting myself into and am way outside my comfort zone. It is the only way I will continue to grow.

I want to keep learning on my own time - for things like my internship - to continue to increase my quality of work that I produce.

I am going to keep cutting myself a break and remind myself I am doing the very best that I can, and I have grown so much in the last year and will continue to do so.

I want to continue to volunteer and be involved in many different groups to have community and support that I need.

I never want to stop writing. Whether for the newspaper, the Odyssey, or a book - I must keep pushing myself to express all that is inside me. It is so incredibly cathartic.

So, I want to encourage you to look at this past semester or year constructively. Yes, there were things that went wrong or didn't feel very nice, but there were a lot of things that went right, or that you can do to help make things better in the future.