Over the past couple of months, I've stepped back and reflected different aspects of my life. I've analyzed how people have treated me and reprioritized friendships that make me feel validated. I have cut, for the most part, social media as I no longer feel a desperate need to post about every little thing I do to show people I'm "living my best life."
I've realized there are just some things I do not agree with because they damage me mentally and emotionally.
I am not going to just stand to the side and let people walk all over me.
I am not going to let people dictate how I feel for their own happiness and I'm left suffering.
And with that, I have put myself first. Coming to realize why I am suffering and took action rather than just ignoring the issue. I was emotionally hurting and decided that I needed to fix that.
When it comes to our mental health, we often talk about how if we were to break a bone, we must go see the doctor. We wouldn't hesitate. So when it comes to our mental health, why must we hesitate?
I've always been a strong advocate for mental health awareness. Since 8th grade, I've always been to a therapist and it's something I'm proud I did, even if it was not what I thought I needed. I have life skills that have improved my overall quality of life.
However, there was a period of my life where I thought I was invincible. "Hey, I've been through 4 years of therapy, I'm okay. I can handle the world." But I was so wrong. Life brings up new challenges for which we must adapt.
Scott Peck's "A Road Less Traveled" talks about how we are not born with this road maps that help direct how we are meant to go through life. From time and time again, we must step back and reanalyze life to see what we must work on and improve. We must continue to progress through life rather than standing still and going through the emotions. That is when we are miserable, at our lowest point.
I got so low that I needed to go back to therapy, to improve and gain new life skills.
By going back to therapy, I have people claim "you are being selfish" when I said no to different people and/or activities. They just do not align up with my values, or they make me feel miserable. I am not going to let myself suffer knowingly.
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.
There is no excuse to keep toxic people in your life when you can be enjoying people who are only positive. That even includes sometimes canceling things or saying no to someone if you're uncomfortable.
So yes, I'd rather stay home with my roommates and watch "Parks and Rec". Or sometimes I want to seclude myself into my bedroom and watch Netflix while lighting a few candles. I want my quality time to rejuvenate or just relax after days of being up and about.
I also will be ready for whatever 3 a.m. shenanigans you might want to embark on.
This past semester, I've come to realize my limitations, obstacles, and worked to overcome them. I've acknowledged my strengths and worked hard to strengthen them. I am putting myself as a priority to grow and be the best version of myself.
You have to put you and your well being first.
