I am the first person to admit that my relationship with Jesus has been very immature throughout my years in high school. It may have seemed like I was the Jesus girl, floating around saying I was praying for you, captain and leader in clubs and teams, and the "smart" girl who seemed to have it all together! Well let me tell you, looks aren't everything. I was rarely in the word, praying, or pursuing a relationship with God. Yes- I believed in God, I went to church, but my heart wasn't actively seeking out God and to be honest my heart was not in it.

Now, I am not here to say I am perfect and now I read my Bible everyday, am always praying and always seeking out God, but I have this new hunger for God and his word. I get excited when I open up my Bible every morning, I love being around people who also share my faith and I honestly crave God when I miss a day with Him. I have developed the type of relationship with Christ that I had never knew existed before. I love my church at home, but pursuing a personal and deep relationship with God isn't something that we really talk about. Sure my pastor says that we should be in the word everyday and be praying but that just seems like routine to me. It makes it seem like a checklist that we have to complete every day. I want my relationship with God to be strong, true and genuine and something that I want to do.

I still fall short in EVERY single way possible. I struggle with body image, I feel anger towards people, I lie, I envy my friends, and I put myself and my needs before others every day. I bring those to God, and I ask him to take those sins and wash them clean. I come to Him asking for a forgiveness only he can give.

I want to encourage anyone who thinks that they are following Christ and I want them to ask themselves if they are ACTIVELY seeking out God everyday. Something that really struck me was if God and I are in a relationship which we are, do I talk to Him everyday? Do I listen to what he is telling me through his messages (Bible)? Do I tell everybody how awesome he is? Those questions really got me thinking if my outward "Christian" appearance matched my inward Heart.