7 Messy Things Everyone Is Guilty Of Saying After A Rough Breakup
Start writing a post
Health Wellness

7 Messy Things Everyone Is Guilty Of Saying After A Rough Breakup

These unhealthy (but common) habits can lead to unhealthy mindsets.

189
7 Messy Things Everyone Is Guilty Of Saying After A Rough Breakup

Sometimes building the right relationship can be hard, and it is incredibly discouraging when you find yourself in a pattern of failed attempts. Throughout the process of meeting someone, it is important to not pretend to be someone else, act like you care less than you do or even blame yourself if things don't end up working out. Here are seven things that people say about relationships that--in the end--can be detrimental.

1. “I ruined everything.”

78.media.tumblr.com

Sometimes people are too quick to find fault in themselves as to why something didn't work out exactly as planned. They believe that if they had been less awkward, less needy or less stupid, things may have gone differently. The truth is, sometimes situations simply don't work out and it is never any one person's fault. We need to stop being conditioned to immediately believe that we were in the wrong and are to blame for somehow sabotaging everything.

2. "If I seem cool enough, they will take notice of me.”

encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com

While it is a good thing to put yourself out there and gain some confidence, it is vital to not think that you must change yourself in order for someone to notice you. If it takes you altering your image or acting like a completely different person in order to get someone you like back, it's time to question if all that effort over one person is really worth your time.

3. “I need to make them jealous.”

media1.tenor.com

I admit that a very quick way to catch someone's attention is to stir up a little jealousy. This may involve paying lots of attention to a person on a night out and laughing a little louder than you should have. While there is no harm in proving to someone that you are well-liked, this behavior of finding satisfaction in another person's jealousy isn't a good basis for ANY future relationship.

4. “I need to play hard to get.”

www.reactiongifs.com

I think the biggest problem when it comes to new relationships is that people are unwilling to be vulnerable and honest about their feelings. Instead, we'd rather act like we don't care as much as we actually do. We play hard to get and act uninterested, when that isn't actually how we feel. Instead, I think we should be bold and honest when we talk to our significant others, because that is how commitment, trust and security are gained.

5. “I have to find someone before he/she does.”

www.maxim.com

Sometimes things don't work out as we hope, and the person you had a 'thing' with is no longer in the picture. You may feel slightly hurt, but many people's approach to retaliation is to find a rebound before their ex-partner does. This is probably the WORST thing you can do, not only because it doesn't prove anything and means you are still prioritizing your ex in your life, but it's also not fair to the person you rebound with.

6. “I need to make sure they are still hung up on me.”

media.giphy.com

Breakups suck, but the best thing you can do is stop focusing on how your ex may be handling things and simply work to improve yourself and get over it. It's only natural to want your ex to feel just as poorly as you do (or even worse), especially when you feel terrible yourself. You want the confirmation that you actually meant something to that person, but you can't rely on making them feel just as miserable as you, otherwise you'll never get over them or have a chance to grow yourself.

7. “I wasn’t good enough.”

i.gifer.com

Please, please, PLEASE never tell yourself this when something doesn't work out or if things haven't worked out several times in a row. There is nothing wrong with you. You need to know your worth and look for someone you truly deserve. Never settle for anything less, and, if that takes multiple failed attempts at relationships, don't take it as a testament to your "undesirability," your "unattractiveness" or an inability to live up to expectations.

Instead, we should try to be honest with ourselves about how we feel, what we deserve and who we want to be. The best types of relationships stem from a level of vulnerability and an effort to improve and love oneself instead of relying on other people to determine your worth.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Tumblr

Chick-fil-A, I love you.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

An open letter to my father

What you did sounds dumb to me

932
An open letter to my father
The Truth About My Parents' Divorce

Considering im 18 now & you're one of the best men i've ever met since you have a child; me. I want you to know that I love you, more than anyone, I love you. I don't forgive you for the way you hurt my mother. I'm hurt because you broke our family. Thing went down hill the day you found Laquita. You we're distant & shortly after my mother turned into the coldest, saddest women to walk past me. She's my best friend & so are you. Not one day goes by where I don't wonder what she did wrong. How on earth could you trade your family & the women who loved you unconditionally for a home wrecker? Sounds dumb to me.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

Is God Reckless?

Exploring the controversy behind the popular worship song "Reckless Love"

1925
Is God Reckless?


First things first I do not agree with people getting so caught up in the specific theology of a song that they forget who they are singing the song to. I normally don't pay attention to negative things that people say about worship music, but the things that people were saying caught my attention. For example, that the song was not biblical and should not be sung in churches. Worship was created to glorify God, and not to argue over what kind of theology the artist used to write the song. I was not made aware of the controversy surrounding the popular song "Reckless Love" by Cory Asbury until about a week ago, but now that I am aware this is what I have concluded.The controversy surrounding the song is how the term reckless is used to describe God's love. This is the statement that Cory Asbury released after many people questioned his theology regarding his lyrics. I think that by trying to clarify what the song was saying he added to the confusion behind the controversy.This is what he had to say,
"Many have asked me for clarity on the phrase, "reckless love". Many have wondered why I'd use a "negative" word to describe God. I've taken some time to write out my thoughts here. I hope it brings answers to your questions. But more than that, I hope it brings you into an encounter with the wildness of His love.When I use the phrase, "the reckless love of God", I'm not saying that God Himself is reckless. I am, however, saying that the way He loves, is in many regards, quite so. What I mean is this: He is utterly unconcerned with the consequences of His actions with regards to His own safety, comfort, and well-being. His love isn't crafty or slick. It's not cunning or shrewd. In fact, all things considered, it's quite childlike, and might I even suggest, sometimes downright ridiculous. His love bankrupted heaven for you. His love doesn't consider Himself first. His love isn't selfish or self-serving. He doesn't wonder what He'll gain or lose by putting Himself out there. He simply gives Himself away on the off-chance that one of us might look back at Him and offer ourselves in return.His love leaves the ninety-nine to find the one every time."
Some people are arguing that song is biblical because it makes reference to the scripture from Matthew 28:12-14 and Luke 15. Both of these scriptures talk about the parable of the lost sheep and the shepherd. The shepherd symbolizes God and the lost sheep are people that do not have a relationship with God. On the other hand some people are arguing that using the term reckless, referring to God's character is heretical and not biblical. I found two articles that discuss the controversy about the song.The first article is called, "Reckless Love" By Cory Asbury - "Song Meaning, Review, and Worship Leading Tips." The writer of the article, Jake Gosselin argues that people are "Making a mountain out of a molehill" and that the argument is foolish. The second article, "God's Love is not Reckless, Contrary to What You Might Sing" by author Andrew Gabriel argues that using the term reckless is irresponsible and that you cannot separate Gods character traits from God himself. For example, saying that God's love is reckless could also be argued that God himself is reckless. Reckless is typically not a word that someone would use to describe God and his love for us. The term reckless is defined as (of a person or their actions) without thinking or caring about the consequences of an action. However, Cory Asbury is not talking about a person, he is talking about God's passionate and relentless pursuit of the lost. While I would not have chosen the word reckless, I understand what he was trying to communicate through the song. Down below I have linked two articles that might be helpful if you are interested in reading more about the controversy.


Keep Reading... Show less
Student Life

10 Signs You Grew Up In A Small Town

Whether you admit it or not, that tiny town will always have your heart.

1749
The Odyssey

1. You still talk to people that you went to elementary school with.

These are the people you grew up with and the people you graduated high school with. The faces you see in kindergarten are the same faces you’ll see for the rest of your life.

Keep Reading... Show less
Student Life

150 Words For Anyone Who Loves Football Games

Why I love high school football games, even though I don't like football.

2729
Dallas News

When most think of high school they think of friend drama, parties, getting your drivers license, and best of all foot ball games.

Keep Reading... Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments