Here's what I've learned about running, you either hate it or love it. There are people who tolerate it, but you know they would much rather be doing something else. Cardio, in general, is either a love or hate relationship. I, myself, used to hate running. I only tolerated it because I loved playing soccer, which includes an extensive amount of running.
But, I learned very quickly you learn to appreciate and love something much more when it's gone. I run because once upon a time I couldn't. And I never felt so helpless, so angry, so lost, and so determined to do it again.
When I was a seventeen, I injured my knee. The classic ACL injury: surgery, three to four months of rehabilitation, a total six month recovery period, and a good year to be back to normal. My experience was particularly painful, as I am allergic NSAIDs. And for anyone who doesn't know, that means anti-inflammatory. So take a moment to imagine your knee the size of a red, hot, swollen ball for months on end. It was miserable, and it +made range of motion that much more difficult.
And while I recovered, and returned to soccer, I will never forget the moment I realized I couldn't walk, let alone run. It was a heartbreaking, infuriating, and embarrassing feeling all in one. But it is an injury I could recover from, unlike so many others.
I run because I know what is like to be incapable of it. I had to learn it all over again. Imagine, something you've been doing for so long, something natural, to become a new phenomenon. It's painful. It's awkward. But the end result is worth it all.
I love it now, I appreciate it. I love the burning in my legs, the way my mind goes blank. The ultimate freedom it bestows. And I appreciate every day that I am able to do it. I run because my knee needs to understand high intensity. Because if I stop, my knee sometimes forgets, and its like taking five steps backward instead of two steps forward. And it hurts like it used to. I run for my health. I run because it calms me down when I feel sad or anxious.
I also, in some way, shape, or form, run for those who can't. You see, if I have learned anything, it is that despite all my pain, I know there are people out there who will never be able to walk. Or run. Those are the people I think of every time I take my next step, because I was given a brief glimpse of not only a physical pain, but an emotional pain. That particular pain, in essence, is longing for something you can never have, or it is feeling grief for something you lost and it is a painful fight to get it to return. That pain is not something that easily melts away, nor is the struggle to overcoming that pain.
So what did I learn? To appreciate the power of running.
I run, because one day, I fear it might just be my last one.
