As many great minds have noted, you can only come so close to obtaining truth when you have looked at a situation from all other perspectives. In other words, you cannot have an adequate understanding of an event of any kind unless you hear the interpretation of everyone involved.

For example, two friends have a fight. If you only talk to one friend, you will likely side with him because, in all probability, he believes himself to be right and will not share why he might be wrong. However, if you talk to both friends, you may find yourself agreeing with the other friend or telling them both that they are being unreasonable.

My entire college experience has, in many ways, revolved around perspective. As a double major, I have had to adapt to two very different ways of viewing and interpreting the world around me. I find that they are both equally valid and useful, depending on the scenario.

As a person who extends the possibility of friendship to everyone unless given good reason otherwise, I have been party to several different sub-sects of the same majors. These sub-sects tend to disagree with one another. When this happens, it is always fascinating to hear all sides of the situation and to make up my own mind about who is right. Often, I find that what I thought was righteous anger was actually a case of miscommunication and misunderstanding.

In the end, I generally come to the conclusion that none of them are entirely in the right. If they were to have an honest, intelligent conversation with one another they could likely end the disagreement swiftly and perhaps move on as friends.

Unfortunately, this usually does not happen. This is likely because it is difficult for people to be open and honest with those they believe do not like them and it is even harder for them to admit that they may be wrong.

I feel like the world—or at least, college—would be a happier, healthier place if all the people involved took the time to understand each other and to be honest when they are hurting or feel unjustly treated.

For instance, Joel, a hypothetical being, has invited everyone to a party at his house, save Tristan, Meghan, and Greg. They feel left out and never quite forgive Joel for his oversight. Had they asked, he would have told them that he had forgotten to invite them and, when they didn’t show up, thought that they had decided not to come. Of course, it does not feel good to be forgotten, but it certainly shows that Joel was not trying to be malicious. Perhaps next time he would make doubly sure that everyone was invited.

Instead, Tristan, Meghan, and Greg will believe that Joel did not want them at his party and will resent him.

Granted, it is not always so simple. Sometimes, the Joel in the scenario will maliciously leave out the Tristans, Meghans, and Gregs. However, it saves everyone a lot of grief to know for sure what the other person’s intention was. Maybe malicious Joel will even have an understandable reason, if it isn’t one that will make Tristan, Meghan, and Greg feel better.

Ergo, the next time you have a disagreement with someone, perhaps it would be helpful to try to understand them more thoroughly instead of letting your anger get the better of you.

* Title is taken from Abraham Lincoln: “We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.”