This isn't a normal response article since it is a response to an article I wrote. I had written " Once upon A time I had A Best Friend " about 2-3 weeks after said best friend had "broke up " with me. That incident happened at the end of February and now it is the end of May, I can say that I have grown within those few months.

Now I am not writing this to say my feelings in that article are not valid because I still back up each word. But rather I am writing this for anyone going through a loss, whether it be with a significant other or best friend. I want to let you know that it gets better and I know that seems so idealistic and so not what you want to hear right now. I guess I'll let you in on what my experience was.

I will start with just before the article was written:

1. Denial

I tried everything in my power to make this friendship not end. I tried reasoning and I was blaming myself and I didn't understand what was happening. How could this happen to us? We had a perfect friendship, we did everything together, we went everywhere together, we had the same classes; we were inseparable. I couldn't handle the life change that was happening and so I denied it. I kept thinking, he'll get over this. We can work through this. I was scared because this was going to change basically every aspect of my life. (A/N, not EVERY aspect but that was my thought then).

1. What if/blame game

This is where it became apparent that shit... this is real. And so I blamed myself for what happened. I kept thinking what if I did this, or said that? What if I was expecting too much? Am I just freaking out? What could have I done to fix things?

3. My life without that person

A: The first part of this step was hand in hand with steps 2 and 3. I will revisit this at the very end as well. Now this person and I run in the same crowd, as stated before. We hung out together all the time and so it's not a surprise our friend group is basically very similar. So I saw him a lot. More than I wanted to. At first, I tried to avoid it. I would slip into class late or I would leave really quickly. I wouldn't go to my friends if he was there. I moved my seats. We basically ignored each other. And each time it hurt. Equally. That pain wasn't getting better. Maybe even worse. In this time period, my second best friend (whom me and the one who I broke up with shared) decided she didn't want to be friends with me either, which did not help the situation at all. I was so sad, I even at one point didn't want to talk to anyone because I didn't want to become close to anyone else and give them the chance to hurt me.

4. I made new friends

This step is kind of the opposite of the other step. Fortunately, I had friends who made me realize that I would not be myself if I gave up on people and friendships. Now the time I used to spend with him, I had to spend with other wonderful people. People that before were my friends, but now I had the chance to get closer to them. (A/N: I want to shout out Mariam and Joe because they made this so much easier than it could have been and I want to thank them for being there each step of the way. Also a little shout out to Priunka and Sinem: for listening to my rants each and every single one of them, I can't write my journey through this without mentioning them. There are a bunch more but they know who they are).

5. I started feeling myself again

With these new bonds, I realized that my life will go on. That there are still so many memories I have to make. There is joy in each day I just have to look for it. There are others that I will laugh with. Others that I will have random Dance parties with. Other people who appreciate me for me and don't want to change me or make me feel like I was the problem.

6. My life without that person (again)

I no longer felt sad looking at him because I was right in my first article, "I will be alright" because I was. I no longer avoided places. I had other friends. I felt like myself again, and I can truly say I was over it.

7. Acceptance

Looking back now, my best friend broke up with me and now I know why. Our friendship wasn't healthy, and it certainly was not perfect. I realize now what he probably realized way before, that our lives are better without each other. I want to thank both of the friends who cut me out and tell them I'm doing great and that I value our memories. And even though my ending with the second friend was ugly and we may never want to be each other's friends again, that does not mean I will forget the good times.

Now going back to the person reading this who may be going through this right now, do not cut yourself off from your friends, they want to help. They might not know how but they are there. If you feel like you have no more friends then MAKE SOME MORE. If someone doesn't want you in their life, then they don't deserve to be in yours. There are plenty of people out there that you will clique with. Just be open to new possibilities.

To anyone reading this who has a friend going through this. They need you. And they may say they are fine or try to push you away. Stay. They'll appreciate it. You know if it were the other way around they will be there for you.

To anyone who was the dumper, I can imagine the decision being a tough one. You had to think about the outcomes and all the possibilities beforehand. You came to realize that you had to end things for both of us. Know that right now that person is in a world of pain and you might either be relieved or also in that pain. But also know that they will get over you and move on. So thank you for ending things and we hope you have a great life. Thank you for the memories you shared with that individual.

Love,

Your neighborhood humanoid