Hello Jessica Ulett!

I am a thin girl who recently came across your article “Sorry I'm A Size 00” and has also been told throughout my entire life that I should eat more and have also been accused of having anorexia. Even with this “harassment,” I will never, ever complain about those comments. Why? Because they don't actually hurt me the way disparaging comments hurt plus-sized individuals. Let me elaborate.

So, as you've addressed, you are a size 00, which means that your size is the average for US models, (well, most are actually a 0, but you get my point). Your waist size is a pipe dream to the majority of American women, especially considering their average size is a 16. Your body type is seen on every top magazine in the country, and is thought of as a beacon of beauty and the preferred standard for all women (even if for some women with larger hips it's actually physically impossible). Here are some recent magazine covers for example.

Hey, look! It's conventionally thin actress Dakota Johnson with the words “new size” next to her face that indirectly says, “Look at her! She's a successful actress who’s thin! Maybe YOU should aspire to be thin too so you can be pretty and popular like her!”

Here's another example:

Hey! It's popular beauty icon and thin model Gigi Hadid on Vogue! Oh, and look what's written by her leg: “the shape of the season” (psst, that's magazine talk for, “be thin for summer or else people will ridicule you for wearing a swimsuit out in public if you're over a size 12.”)

Wherever you go, you see your body type represented in the media with expectations for thinness being shoved down the throats of western women (and men) across the world.

Now, you might still be thinking, “but wait! Those thin shaming comments made toward me still hurt my feelings! Don't those still hold value?” This argument reminds me of when white people get mad over “cracker” jokes. You know, the ones about how all white people do is drive minivans, have kids named Miekaleigh and Ashylienn and always want to “speak to the manager.” The difference between those white people jokes and the ones about African Americans (which often joke about assumed unintelligence, poverty, or absent fathers) is that those jokes CONTRIBUTE to stereotyping, profiling, and wrongful judgments of character. They make members of the black community look weak or somehow less civilized than other demographics in a way that white jokes do not. White jokes don't hurt white people because they are in a position of power, and skinny jokes don't hurt skinny people because their appearance is seen as superior to other body types.

I'm not denying that being told to “eat a sandwich” is annoying and maybe a little hurtful, but does that comment sting the same way being told to starve or even kill yourself for being fat will? Of course not, because it's just a harmless joke made toward someone who fits society's standard of beauty (and therefore cannot be seriously hurt by these comments) from someone who has been told their entire life that they are worthless as a person if they aren't thin.

Has your thinness ever held you back from a job opportunity, made you get worse care from your doctors, or ever led people to assume you are lazy and unintelligent? Of course not, but that kind of discrimination frequently happens to people who are overweight.

Sure, body shaming in general sucks, but attacking skinny-shaming to defeat body-shaming is the same as trying to stop racism by attacking reverse racism first: you're attacking the defense of the oppressed instead of understanding WHY the oppressed created the attack in the first place. Larger people make fun of skinny people to get back at society for mistreatment over their weight the way African Americans make fun of white people to show how much power whites unfairly hold over them.

If you genuinely dislike body shaming, stop complaining about skinny jokes meant to highlight thin privilege, and work to stop all forms of shaming which causes serious mental and emotional health problems. You're complaining about a fake problem instead of working toward a real solution.

The bottom line is: you are NOT being bullied, you are not truly suffering from these comments and there's no reason for you to be offended by something that has no real affect on your life other than that it makes you slightly uncomfortable. Sorry.

Sincerely,

A Skinny Girl Who Learned the Truth About Skinny-Shaming