“Listen to your parents.” “Respect your elders." Young kids hear this a lot. It’s instilled in us from the first time we meet our grandparents, go to school or are introduced to our friend’s parents. As we get older we are reminded to pay attention to our college professors. As young professionals, we are advised to find a mentor (or three) in our desired career field. Despite all this, we often aren’t interested in listening to the advice of people older than us. We think that they are old-fashioned, outdated, or just plain boring. We view them as out-of-touch, sometimes as a burden in a society racing toward the newest thing.
A radical change in perspective comes with the realization that anyone older was once a 20-something with the same hopes, fears and goals that we have. Sure, times change, but at the fundamental level, the issues that we face today are the same ones they faced then. Why aren’t we more willing to learn from the aged? 1 Timothy 5:1-2 says “Do not rebuke an older man but encourage him as you would a father, younger men as brothers, older women as mothers, younger women as sisters, in all purity."
I think as young people that we should ask for the insights of our elders more often. My grandmother lived in Germany during World War II and was evacuated in the Berlin Airlift. Countless ladies in my church have wrestled through the struggles of singleness, married life and motherhood. Other people around me have been full-time missionaries for longer than I have been alive. They all have fascinating memories to share. Why do we not tap into this resource for wisdom?
As teenagers and young adults we can be quick to write older people off, especially the elderly. We look at them and see gray hair. We can see declining bodies and wrinkled skin and automatically assume that there’s nothing to be gained from a relationship. This is not the case. Proverbs 20:29 says “The glory of young men is their strength, but the splendor of old men is their gray hair." Friendships aren’t restricted by race, socioeconomic class or appearance. They don’t need to be restricted by age either. While you might not have as much in common with your elderly neighbor as the guy who sits next to you in class, you neighbor brings insight and experience to the table that your peer can’t offer.
Most of the adults and elderly people around us have experiences that we can learn from. The goals that we have - success, love, families and fulfilling careers - are things that they’ve striven for. Older adults have better ideas of what will help us to reach our goals than we do. If we listened to them, maybe we wouldn’t feel such a need to spend our prime years getting high or hammered. We might realize what’s important to spend time on and what doesn’t matter in the long run. Proverbs 19:20 reminds us, “Listen to advice and accept instruction, that you may gain wisdom in the future."
I’m not advocating that we live our lives by the dictates of the past. I’m not saying that middle-aged and elderly people have everything figured out. We should take things with a grain of salt and filter them through the truth found in God’s word. What I am saying is that young adults can learn a lot about how to live their future from other’s pasts. We need to be seeking wise counsel from more mature people, especially the more mature Christians in our lives. They have something valuable to offer. 1 Peter 5:5 sums this up well. “Likewise, you who are younger, be subject to the elders. Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for ‘God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.’”
