I remember being sixteen and thinking my mom is the worst. I told myself that I would never talk to her again—not once or twice, but many times. How dare she tell me to clean my room again. What makes her think she can yell at me ALL THE TIME? I actually thought that, as soon as I graduated high school, I would go off on my own and not look back.
Boy, was I wrong.
The truth is, I need my mom. I needed her in high school, I definitely needed her in college, and I need her today. She’s my best friend.
In high school, I leaned on her for much more than groceries and a place to stay. I talked to her about friends, about boys. She helped me through sports and my many medical scares. She offered up advice without any expectations.
When I got to college, I moved out of my mom’s house and began my first long-term relationship. That particular time in my life came with many ups and even more downs. I failed classes, I gained weight, and my self-esteem dropped. I didn’t like me anymore. And lunch with my mom was the only thing that made a difference.
She would encourage me to be happy. She'd tell me when I could do better. She'd push me to make decisions that I couldn't make on my own.
Now I watch as my younger sister struggles through her high school days, arguing with our mom on a daily basis. Whether it’s about a messy room or a sink full of dishes, it seems like there’s no middle ground. And I remember how I felt in her shoes. It wasn’t fun and I would’ve rather been anywhere else but home.
But I’ve grown up a lot since then. I talk to my mom about how she feels and I get it. I’m back at home now—living with her and my sister until I graduate—and sharing a bathroom with a teenage girl. The basement is a mess and—let’s be honest—there are tampons everywhere. And I was just as bad. So when Mom is raging about her “slobs” for children, I understand. It’s because we are slobs.
My mom and I were able to get past those tough years—and thank goodness for that. I wouldn’t be where I am today without her. I’d probably still be in an unhealthy relationship or talking to the assholes that I so enjoyed engaging in conversation. I’d probably be graduating with a 2.0 while planning to keep my job at the local diner. But instead, I’ll be graduating with a degree in education and have aspirations to do so much more.
So to all you teenage girls out there wondering how on Earth anyone gets along with their mothers: hang in there. It’s so worth it.
