When you've lived somewhere your whole life, you don't find yourself in the position of leaving people. People leave you. They move away, they go to school, they continue their lives in a new place with a new start.

When people move away from you, a sort of loneliness sets in. You feel like you're being abandoned, to a degree. You hear about your friends' new life and the new people they're meeting, the new things they're doing. They seem almost like different people because of the different opportunities that are in other places. But it really isn't any easier for the person who has moved away.

I have found myself in a pattern for the last three years where I move every three to four months. Whether that's a move to a new city, state, or country, it's difficult. Initially, it's scary and lonely, especially if it's a place unfamiliar to you. The only people who know you are the ones you've left behind. You call your friends back home, you talk to your family to feel less lonely. The one who left and the ones who stayed are going through the same missed connection. But, this stage doesn't last long.

Eventually, you make new friends, and you get to know new people. And that's when life gets exciting. You experience new restaurants and bars and workflows and groups of people. When you get wrapped up in all the excitement of newness, you've come to the stage of neglect.

The phone calls happen less and for a shorter amount of time. Texts come less frequently as you have less time to respond. This is the zone where you start to lose friends who get frustrated with the diminished communication. This is the zone you, unfortunately, find yourself thinking less of your friends back home. This is not because you aren't friends anymore or because you've replaced them - we are creatures of socializing and habit and even though we've padded our society with things like social media to universalize the world. It is still a significant separation.

This all sounds very sad; friends leaving and friends being left, miscommunications, loneliness, etc. There are plenty of benefits to this too. Namely, superficial friendships and relationships just do not survive this transition. When the phone calls home do happen or when you visit home, you know exactly who your real friends and loved ones are.

The distance doesn't affect your love for each other, only the amount of experiences you share. You fall right back into how things always were. The world feels smaller and safer knowing that there are people who love and support you even if you're not engaging with them day to day.

I encourage those who have never moved out of their hometown to try it out. Experience life outside your bubble, you can't fully see your bubble until you step out of it. You don't know who you truly get along with and who truly appreciates you as a person back until you survive a relationship from a distance.