To all the boys I've loved before,

Thank you for loving me at the times in my life where I probably needed it the most. Some of you were there when I felt at my weakest and some of you were attracted to me because I was at my strongest. Every one of you helped showed me how to care for others and grew with me when I was weak. You all showed me in your own ways who to treat another human being and while not every action was positive, I learned from them and grew as a person and I hope you did, too.

I remember all of the happy memories like it was yesterday and I also remember the sad memories and how they made me feel about myself. I remember the laughs and I remember all of the tear-filled nights. I remember the late night conversations and I remember the long car rides singing popular songs at the tops of our lungs. I remember the nights when one of us needed the other the most and how we were always there for each other. I remember the way each of you made me feel when we were together, and I especially remember knowing in my heart that no matter how good the high times were, I knew none of you were The One. I may not have understood it at the time, but I understand now why every good moment had to come to an end.

Thank you for setting me free and allowing me to finally find myself. I have always struggled with finding my identity within the people I spend the most time with, so when you left, I felt so lost and desperate for help. I felt like I had no sense of self and losing your own identity is a thousand times scarier than losing any person. I remember feeling like I lost so much more than just a body when you left and while it hurt a lot at the time and my future seemed so bleak, I now see how it was all meant to be. I can now see which way my path goes in this crazy thing called life and I have you to thank for that solidarity.

Lastly, thank you for shaping me into the person I am today.

Through all of the hard times, I have found who I was truly meant to be and I am so thankful for it. I finally advocate more of myself rather compromise for a relationship to stay above water. I finally see what I have been missing out on this whole time, I finally see what life can be like with someone who truly loves you and how amazing a true connection can feel and I have all of you to thank for that. For the first time in my life, I feel safe and secure for totally different reasons than I could ever think possible. You each hurt me and healed me and I will never forget it.

Thank you.