9 Song Lyrics That Explain Why My Past Relationship Was Full Of Red Flags

9 Song Lyrics That Explain Why My Past Relationship Was Full Of Red Flags

I needed to open my eyes.

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When it comes to relationships there are bound to be songs that you hear throughout that remind you of your significant other; when you break up those songs are still connected to that person. Sometimes it's positive and you reminisce about the good things, but other times they make you realize that you missed some major red flags. Here are 9 song lyrics that remind me of my past relationship, and why they should have been red flags.

1. “You kiss me as if it's a favor done for me” - Rich White Girls, Mansionz

I remember when I got the courage to kiss you goodbye for the first time after one of our dates and feeling my stomach get butterflies as I pulled away. You had always been the one to kiss me. As time went on, it seemed more and more like I was the one who had to kiss you, and when you kissed me first that it was a job. It was something you did for me, not because you wanted to and that should never be the case.

2. “I feel your chest, but I can't find your heart” - Obsessed, Maggie Lindemann

Looking into your eyes I realized at some point something switched, and you had started looking at me to see your own reflection. It became a game of "I'm the man, and you're lucky I still let you love me." The heart I thought you had, the one I thought was full of love for me was truly only full of yourself and your ego.

3. “I don’t know how I let you lead so long 'Cause right now you’re only holding me back 'Cause I’m not where I want to be, and you’re not who I wish you were” - Fever Dream, Grayscale

You were in control of me and what we were, but what we were and who you were isn't what I wished it was. With that said, it was all I knew. Our relationship isn't something I regret, but it is something that held me back from things I loved. You didn't support my hobbies, you told me they dumb, yet I still supported yours. What I loved was just to make you happy.

4. “I got you figured out, you need to have control” - Yes Girl, Bea Miller

It didn't take you long to realize you had a power over me; you had complete control. I would drop almost anything when you would call me. That was an error. As soon as I took any control back from you, or I didn't seem to care what you said, you would snap. You always found some way to put me down, to put me back in what you thought was my place and for you to get your control back. I was powerless.

5. “And I use every bone in my body to keep on holding on to your trust” - Dang!, Mac Miller

Trust is something that is the foundation of a relationship, at least in my mind. When my trust in you started to slip, I did everything in my power to regain it. I was holding onto the little bits of things you were honest about, even when those little bits were things that hurt. In reality, I shouldn't have trusted you, but you had led me to believe that you were worth it.

6. “And I can’t tell anyone the morning after you.” - Morning After, Meg Myers

When I would spend the night I would leave early the next morning for work, and you would walk me out and kiss me goodbye. That was a moment I didn't want to leave, because I knew as soon as I left your porch steps you, and the night prior, would be pushed to the back of my mind. I began to hide the fact I had seen you, not daring to tell my friends until weeks later. They all hated you and were disappointed in me. I risked losing those I loved most for you.

7. You want me to be yours, well then you gotta be mine” - My Boi, Billie Eilish

Double standards are wild, aren't they? You said you were okay with me seeing other people because you were too, but boy that was a lie. As soon as you knew I had, you realized you had lost a little control and told me no more. You kept it up though, and I was expected to sit back and be okay with it. I became nothing more than something you had ownership of.

8. “Then you’re gonna put back on your clothes then I'm gonna wish I was alone but we never change a step and do it all again” - Bored, Bea Miller

It's as simple as that, I loved our time between the sheets but as soon as it was done I wanted nothing more than to leave. Grab my clothes, grab my keys, say goodbye and get out. I didn't want the hurt of you not caring for me anymore to set in so I'm would drive home at ungodly speeds and blast music to distract me. I just wanted to be alone, but I knew I'd be back in your bed again soon.

9. “Shoulda listened to the sh*t my mama told me not to mention all the warnings from my homies” - Anymore , Lil Aaron

My friends and my family liked you until our relationship got rocky and we split, the first time that is. We played a game of off and on for so long, and everyone kept telling me you were no good. I didn't listen because you had me wrapped up so tightly around your finger. I should have listened.

What we had I don't regret, in fact, I'm thankful I got to experience the things we did, both good and bad. With that in mind, there were things I wish I would have noticed, all of the red flags are so obvious now. I wish that I would have left earlier. I lost who I was in order to love you, yet that wasn't enough for you to keep loving me.

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An Open Letter To My Boyfriend's Mom

A simple thank you is not enough.
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Your son and I have been dating a while now and I just wanted to thank you for everything.

Wow, where do I start? Ever since the day your son brought me into your home you have shown me nothing but kindness. I have not one negative thought about you and I am truly thankful for that. I first and foremost want to thank you for welcoming me with open arms. There are horror stories of mothers resenting their son's girlfriends and I am blessed there is no resentment or harsh feelings.

Thank you for treating me like one of your children, with so much love but knowing exactly when to tease me.

Thank you for sticking up for me when your son teases me, even though I know it’s all in good fun it's always comforting knowing you have someone by your side.

Thank you for raising a man who respects women and knows how to take responsibility of mistakes and not a boy who is immature and doesn’t take responsibility.

Thank you for always including me in family affairs, I may not be blood family but you do everything you can to make sure I feel like I am.

Thank you for letting me make memories with your family.

There is nothing I value more in this world then memories with friends and family and I am thankful you want and are willing to include me in yours. I have so much to thank you for my thoughts keep running together.

The most important thing I have to thank you for is for trusting me with your son. I know how precious and valuable he is and I won't break his heart. I will do everything I can to make him happy. This means more than you could ever imagine and I promise I will never break your trust.

The second most important thing I must thank you for is for accepting me for who I am. Never have you ever wished I looked like another girl or acted like another girl. You simply love and care for me and that’s all I could ever ask. Every person in this world is a unique different person and understanding that means a lot.

The third most important thing I must thank you is teaching me how to one day in the future treat a potential girlfriend that I may interact with as a mother. I am not a mother, but I one day plan to be. If I ever have a son it is because of how you treated me that I am able to be a humble loving mother to this new face that could one day walk into my door. How you have treated me has taught me how I should one day be in the future and I thank you for that.

This may seem all over the place but that’s how my brain gets when I try and thank you for everything you have done for me. It’s all so much and even the little things are so important so I promise my scattered thoughts are all with good intentions and not meant to bombard you. I just want to get the idea across to you that you are important and special to me and everything you do does not go unnoticed.

Sincerely,

Your Son’s Girlfriend

Cover Image Credit: Christian Images and Quotes

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There's Nothing Wrong With Meeting The Love Of Your Life On A Dating Site

In such a tech-savvy world, why are we so afraid to admit that we found love online?

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Growing up watching rom-coms like "When Harry Met Sally" and "Notting Hill," I've always been a bit of a romantic. I can't count the number of times I've constructed in my mind a completely unrealistic meet-cute where I would find the love of my life. I mean, who doesn't want their own fairy tale romance?

But in this age of social media and dating apps, the chances of accidentally bumping into your soulmate is slim to none. Dating apps like Bumble and Tinder are becoming ever so popular, with more and more individuals meeting their significant other online. So why is it that in such a tech-savvy society, people are still afraid to admit that they found love online?

I blame romantic comedies. Even though many romantic comedies are focused on being "realistic," the chances of me meeting the LOML at a carnival when he decides to climb up the Ferris wheel to talk to me (*cough* "The Notebook" *cough*) are highly unlikely. We've become so fixated on the idea of this perfect relationship that it becomes almost inferior to meet someone through a dating app.

But it's time the stigma ended. Who cares where you met your significant other? Sure, maybe you originally swiped right on Tinder with the sole intention of hooking up, but life happens.

It shouldn't matter that you didn't meet in some crazy, over-the-top fashion.

And sure, there's nothing wrong in hoping for a romantic comedy worthy meet-cute, but you shouldn't let modern cinema dictate your relationship. There's no shame in saying that you met your boyfriend or girlfriend on a dating app. I mean, what are these apps meant for? Meeting online doesn't in any way take away from the legitimacy of one's relationship. So instead of focusing on these so-called perfect moments, let's focus on building perfect relationships because life isn't always a movie.

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