When you're in college, it seems like people are either very single or very committed. There are couples in very serious relationships, with plans of getting married one day, and there are people who are incredibly single and unattached. It's amazing how much you learn about relationships in college, either from your own experience, your friends' experiences or just observing people from the outside.
1. There's a lot more to it than just feelings.
Relationships require a lot more than feelings, which is hard to understand when you're in high school and there aren't a lot of obstacles in the way. Timing is a big part of making a relationship work. Where each person is in their life is also an important element to a relationship. There are so many parts to making a relationship work that boil down to way more than just if you have feelings for each other.
2. Honesty is very important.
Whether it's being honest with your significant other, being honest with someone about what your intentions are or being honest with yourself about how you feel, it's very important to always tell the truth. Nothing good comes from lying and trying to cover things up.
3. Sometimes you'll have to be alone.
I know it's hard, but sometimes you'll have to be alone. We all have to be alone sometimes. Not having someone can be difficult or lonely, but it's good to learn how to be happy all by yourself. Time to yourself teaches you what you want, who you are and what you deserve.
4. Let bad relationships go.
It's always hard to watch your friend to continuously go back to a toxic relationship, and it's especially hard when you're the one going back to a toxic relationship. It's really hard to let go of relationships, even if they're bad, but it's important to do so. We've all heard that cheesy quote about getting rid of back things to make room for better things.
5. Trust your instincts.
Your instincts won't always be right, but it's good to follow them. Your friends definitely love you and want the best for you, but ultimately you have to listen to yourself. If you're no longer happy with someone, it's OK to walk way. If you're interested in someone, pursue it even if it doesn't make total sense. Even if you make a mistake, there's rarely mistakes you can't fix.
6. Don't hurt someone else to help yourself.
It's easy to use someone to make yourself feel better about the things that are bothering you, but not only does it not actually make you feel better, it really hurts another person. We've all made this mistake before. Don't mess with someone else's feelings just to save your own.
7. Everyone has their own relationship problems.
We're all dealing with demons whether we show it or not, even the couple that seems perfect, or the single person who seems very content with their status. My friends and I just realized how silly it is that we aren't open with each other about our various relationship problems because we have them. Be nice to people and be nice to yourself. One day we'll figure things out but right now just accept we're going to have a few problems to deal with here and there, and that is nothing to be ashamed about.
