When I first started college last year as a freshman, I was scared to death. That's putting it lightly, to be honest. I was in a triple when I was supposed to be in a single for medical reasons, and on top of that both of my roommates had the same last name. So, naturally, I assumed they were sisters. My mom was concerned because I was not in a single; since she's a guidance counselor she was afraid I would be left out and my two other roommates would gang up on me. She was nervous, so I was nervous. But move in day came, and my roommates were both fairly nice. We had all agreed to debunk the beds, but later we figured out that our room was not large enough to debunk them and I was stuck on the top bunk since I arrived last.

I have really bad anxiety, and the fact that I now had to sleep on the top bunk was not settling in well with me. I told my new roommates to go to lunch without me because I still had to set up.

Once they left, I sat on the floor and started sobbing. I turned to my parents, thankful that my siblings weren't there to witness this, and said "It's okay guys. I don't need to dorm anyways, I'll just commute with Gerard (my older brother who also started attending St. Johns) every day. This was a big mistake, let's just go home and forget about it."

So there I was, hysterically sobbing on the floor thinking of how big of a mistake this was.

Having one of the worst panic attacks of my life.

All because I felt like my fears were coming true.

I hate change in general- and this moment definitely showed that this was no longer high school. And I had no idea what was going to happen next. And it scared me.

Eventually, I stopped crying and moved into the room and my family left- and I bonded with my roommates etc. Happily Ever After, right?

I didn't just tell this story so you all can know that my first day of college I was hysterically sobbing in a corner. The point is- I didn't know what was going come next in my life. All my friends had ventured off to different colleges and now I had to make new friends and actually compromise with my roommates instead of just yelling at my sister (my roommate at home).

It's overwhelming, it's terrifying, and it's also exciting because this is the first step to actually becoming an adult. It's okay if you have no idea what you're doing most of the time- because I had absolutely no idea what I was doing and yet I still ended up with amazing friends and awesome grades and cool roommates (...most of the time that is).

I'm glad I pushed myself to stay and dorm (not like I really had a choice, but I like to think I did) because it was one of the best experiences that could have happened to me. So yes, there will be disagreements, fights, drama, etc. But in the end, it'll all be worth it.