Life is weird most of the time. Things happen to you as you grow up, whether they are good or bad, and you just can’t quite express how you feel or why you have certain feelings. Things like moving to a different state, going through high school, going to college, dating, heart breaks and family situations are all things that can be so confusing to talk about. But the coolest thing about humans is that we don’t need to speak to express how we feel. We don’t need to physically tell someone why we have feelings for them or how life is feeling right now. The art of writing can take place of that.
I’ve always been jealous of music artists. You know when you hear a song that perfectly explains how you feel with a certain situation? How it can literally give you goosebumps or make you cry, not out of sadness but just out of pure feels for your life and how connected you feel with that song? Yeah, I’ve always wanted to have that ability to write songs -- and singing them would be cool but I sound like a tone-deaf toad. And then I had this realization that I do have a similar talent...I do write, and I would like to think that I’m decent at it. I never really explored the idea as to why I like to write, a lot of people hate it or think its just a chore that needs to be done for schooling purposes.
And then there are people like me. We feel every emotion just a little stronger but have less of an ability to actual express ourselves to those around us. I struggle with verbally telling people I love them, with opening up to a new person or a new relationship. Why? Who knows. Maybe out of fear of losing that person. That fear makes it a lot more real to express any emotion that is serious. So instead of always opening up directly, I write about things.
I write about a happy memory to express how grateful I am for having that person in my life. I write about the hard things to talk about, like illnesses that a family member has or things happening in our world right now. I write about feeling love for someone I never thought I would feel. I write about the frustrations within a relationship and I write about the heartbreak they brought me. Countless articles I’ve written will never actually be read by anyone, but that isn’t the point. Being able to write out my feelings makes it easier to get my thoughts in check and head wrapped around the situation. Once they are written out I can read over them as many times as I need to remind myself that that thing did happen and its okay to be upset or happy or confused about life. Reading it over reminds me that life is weird, but its supposed to be - right? And just maybe, the things I write that really matter to me, people will read and relate to as well. They might not feel alone or confused, just like I feel when I hear a song that expresses my feelings exactly.The art of written words can actually help heal a person, whether you are the one writing them or listening and reading them. There’s something more emotional about the unspoken expression of one's thoughts, it feels more real and cuts a little deeper. And that’s why I write, because it keeps me sane and maybe helps other people stay sane as well.
