Recently, due to some unfortunate events, I started fighting with my best friend. Just so it is clear, when I say fighting I do not mean we are physically hurting each other. It is more of an argument that has us texting back and forth about it because, well, right now, we are in different states. Of course, we have had fights before but those quickly faded when we both realized that it was silly for us to be fighting over nothing (or what I look back on and think is nothing but obviously at the time meant something to one of us). Yet, this one is worse than I ever thought our fights would ever get. I have shed many tears about this, but that is besides the point. The important thing to remember when fighting with your best friend (or anyone for that matter) is that life moves on and everything will work out in the end. Here are four reasons why it is going to be okay.
1. Fights are going to happen.
The truth? They happen in every relationship you have. Think back to when you last fought with your parents, sibling(s) or even significant other. I am sure by now you have realized that those fights, for the most part, do not last longer than a day or two at the most. Why is that? Because you realize that no matter how bad things get, you can lean on those who are closest to you. Trust me, not all relationships are all sunshine and roses. They are going to have high points and low points. But again, its important to remember that bad times do not last forever.
2. Fighting is actually a "healthy" thing in life.
Let me be clear about this before people jump down my throat. I use the word "healthy" here lightly. I am not saying that if your fight with your best friend while you are sick, you are immediately going to be cured of what ever it is that is affecting you health. What I mean is that you will be able to express yourself and every single thing that you are feeling. It is not good to bottle up all your emotions. In fact, it can be very detrimental to your mental health.
3. It improves your communication skills.
Now, when I say communication skills, I mean that you will learn how to get your point across without being extremely harsh (let me add that I am still working on this part when it comes to the fight with my best friend). So, if you say, in a quiet and a non-aggressive manner, “I don’t like it when you do ___________.” if the person hears you when you say it quietly, they may only think it irritates you, not makes you angry. If you are able to put just enough intensity in the communication, they will get that this is important to you and that you are genuinely upset. And by no means do I think that it is okay to go around yelling at everyone when they do something that makes you upset or angry. What I mean is that sometimes, you just have to let it out. Of course, when you are angry, you will be more aggressive rather than polite but building communication is important and can be a positive outcome of fighting.
And finally...
4.You are human. So stop trying to be perfect.
Fighting is one of the main things that makes you human. (Based on my personal thinking anyway. It is okay if you disagree. I respect your opinions!) Fighting, whether it be with your best friend, significant other, sibling(s) or parents, it shows that you get stress out, you can be in a bad mood or you just get tired and cranky. Fighting proves that no one has a perfect life. I can guarantee that every single person on this planet, now, and for the rest of eternity, will be in some type of argument with someone. Being human is not easy. In fact half the time it is hard. Fighting shows you are human. It shows that you make mistakes. It shows that you care and that you will fight for what you believe in.
So next time you are fighting with your best friend, remember, everything will work out the way it is supposed to. Everything happens for a reason and you never know, maybe the fight could lead to a stronger relationship between the two of you!
