We’ve all seen the movies of two star crossed lovers that meet on a hot summer’s night, destined for the summer of their lives. They usually finish with happy endings such as “The Notebook” or “Grease” or any other movie which teaches you a lesson that true love prevails. But does this really apply to the rules of love in real life? Recently I experienced what I’ll consider a summer adventure because it sure was not what I would call love. So I began comparing these movies to my experience and here are my thoughts on this idea behind the innocence and destined romantic story behind summer love: it’s all bull.
You have the “meet cute” in which the two protagonists meet and it all seems like a puzzle chiming in together. His life and her life they complete each other and it is love at first sight, or it’s the opposites attract type in which he’s a so called bad boy and she’s this good girl looking for some excitement. The guy I met was more like the “love” at first sight, we met and immediately caught each other’s attention. The next step in the movie would be a date…check that too. My movie seemed to be going pretty much according to your typical romance movie. Then he left to his country, came back some time later and I expected to be able to pick up right where we had left off. Of course this is real life, not a Nicholas Sparks’ movie. We were on two different pages, I had the misconception that this could turn out into something really great while he saw it differently. So what do you do now?
The next step would’ve been the part in which one of us titled the relationship, but that wasn’t going to happen, what was I to do? We could have had a great time holding each other under the summer night sky talking about who knows what and trips to the beach and wasting popcorn during a movie but none of that was real. I was stuck believing that destiny would turn it around and maybe we would still have time for those moments before he went off to college. Then I realized, how on earth is that a good idea? I had been heartbroken before, sometimes it was a mutual feeling other times it was just me and this time seemed like it would also be just me. In real life falling for someone only during the summer is such a bad idea. It’s like a test that you have to pass.
Feelings tend to linger. Knowing that someone is only going to be a part of your life for such a short amount of time, is it worth it? At first I thought yes, something is better than nothing and I’ll meet someone else, it’s absolutely no big deal, he’ll move on and so will I and if our paths ever cross I’ll say hi and be happy for him. But this is not the The Notebook. He’s not Noah Calhoun and though I wish I were, I am not Allie Hamilton. It’s easy to see how other people move on in their lives and think about how great it turned out for them. Yet, the process of moving on and actually opening up to a whole new person is not that easy. We live in a century where it’s easier to send a text saying “ I <3 you” than actually looking a person dead in the eye and declaring your true feelings for them. I know one person whose boyfriend takes the time to send her flowers for good luck or to celebrate an achievement.
Romantic gestures have numbed down to one night stands and pick up lines. The idea of summer love is just that, an idea. An affair so unachievable in our day and age. My respects for those people that strive and take pride in their romance and work for it to be more than just an occasion that only seems relevant for that time being. There is nothing wrong with short lived relationships, but when you go into something hoping for a long term result, it’s good to know where the relationship is headed before deciding to invest time and feelings. In the end, I believe term “summer love” should be changed to something like “summer moment”, and movies should stop glorifying it as a romantic milestone.
