Real Talk: Relationships
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Real Talk: Relationships

I think people forget that being in a relationship is a two-part effort.

Real Talk: Relationships
Sofia Gilmore-Montero, Avebury Henge

It's been a pretty stressful week, not going to lie. In just the past few days, I've: realized how much work it's going to be since I signed up for 18 credits, had a minor breakdown, and somehow managed to contract bronchitis. With all of this stress that I've let out in the form of teary conversations, coughing fits, and excessive chocolate-eating, my boyfriend has been a support system- a great one. From walking with me to get my lunch during our break to convincing me to go to the doctor, I can't thank him enough. In a world where most good people aren't thanked enough, I'd like to thank him again… and again and again and again. He might be slightly embarrassed once he's seen this, but it won't matter because he knows it's because I love him. He makes me feel like I'm going about my life the right way. Being with him brings butterflies to my stomach and a smile to my face. Being with him, for lack of a better word, makes me feel nice. It feels right.

I'm not going to say that you have to be in love to be in a good, positive relationship, because that sometimes takes time. That being said, I'd like to take the time to emphasize what kind of a person with whom you should be in a relationship. No matter your sexuality, you deserve someone who would do almost anything, if not anything, to help you. There could be a person you really like spending time with and who has the desire to make you happy, but you don't know if you love yet. Be with someone who makes you laugh because they can be a goof. Be with someone who will learn to cook with you and laugh instead of be grumpy when y'all have to eat have to eat charred grilled chicken because you both misread the recipe. Be with the kind of person who would wake up at 5 AM to get ready for work and would still remember to give you a hug or a kiss even when they aren't a morning person. We all deserve someone who makes us feel good, someone who makes us feel wanted and smart and loved- someone who makes us feel like we belong somewhere in this large, scary world.

You need to do things to make your life better and create a broader knowledge of things that you enjoy. Your person should want to do things with you, be with you, and should be able to compliment you randomly without rhyme or reason. Experience the vastness of this earth and all of its beautiful sights. Figure out what makes each other tick. Playfully pick tickle fights until you both have laughed so much you can't breathe. Go on your midnight trips to Walgreens to buy random things like shampoo and ice cream. Have "childish" piggy back rides. See who can balance the most books on their head. Sit under the stars and get bit by mosquitoes and be okay with it because damn, those stars are gorgeous and you're enjoying the view with someone who cares about you. Laugh honestly and when you snort don't be embarrassed.

I'm not saying that everyone wants to look at the stars, and I'm not saying those things are what all women want to do with your significant other. However, you need that person to understand you well enough and want to do what you need in order to feel good. If you need your significant other to be lovey-dovey most of the time but not when you're feeling down, then you need to find someone that will be okay with that because they want you to be okay, too. If you can't be yourself un-apologetically with the person you're with, what's the point? In world that is already pretty cruel, it would make things at least a little easier for someone to have your back. You can most certainly be happy when you are single; but if you are going to date someone, that person needs to be worth your time, not the creator of more heartache (because, let's face it, life is already pretty tough). Even still, when someone you love is hurting you, intentionally or unintentionally, that's when the logical side of love has to come out- make sure that they know so they can have the chance to work on it. Find the person who compliments you best and draws out the happiness you can create within yourself.

I want to include one of my favorite poems in the history of the universe. I know a lot of people don't like poetry because they don't know how to unfold everything, but this one's quick and simple. When I read it, it fills a small gap in my heart that I didn't know I had.

(I did a five page essay on this last semester, so if you don't understand it leave a comment below. I can break it down.)

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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