Before coming to college, I never really heard much about this double standard that is very much prevalent in the world of rapists and rape victims. It was only when I came to school that I learned more about how rape on college campuses is a serious problem. I’m sure at some point when you came to college you heard the statistic that “roughly 1 in 5 women will be sexually assaulted or raped.” Here’s the thing, that’s just a rough estimate. Those are only ones that have been reported or ones that were “completed” to put it one way. Anyone could be raped. Anyone at any school, no matter how big or small.

The real issue here is that rape is being pushed off to the side like it's not a big deal. BUT IT REALLY IS A BIG DEAL. Do you know how it feels to be taken advantage of? Do you know what its like to be the one who feels helpless because they can’t fight back against their perpetrator? What about when you’re unconscious because someone drugged you just so they could take advantage of you? If you haven’t been a victim, then you don’t know what it’s like.

Here is what I want you to understand. RAPE IS NEVER THE VICTIM’S FAULT. Let me say it again, Rape is never, ever, ever, the victim’s fault. I don’t care if they had a few drinks or if they wore something that showed too much skin. It’s the rapist’s fault that they couldn’t keep their act together.

No victim is ever ASKING to be raped. Do not ever say that someone was “asking for it.” That is just a whole other subject that you need help with. Recently, there was a judge in Canada who said to a rape victim, “Why couldn’t you just keep your knees together?” EXCUSE ME. What you should be saying to the perp is, “WHY COULDN’T YOU KEEP IT IN YOUR PANTS.” No victim is EVER asking for it. I don’t care what the situation is, if they say no, NO MEANS NO.

That brings me to my next point- consent is everything. Anyone who is planning on any type of sexual activity should count on asking their significant other if it is okay. If someone says no, THEN DON’T DO IT. If someone is unconscious, DON’T DO IT. If you didn’t verbally hear and confirm that they wanted sexual contact, THEN DON’T DO IT.

No victim should ever be ashamed of what has happened to them. It wasn’t your fault. It was the person who raped you. It is their fault. If you’ve been raped, report it. Take a stand against your rapist and raise your voice. Contact the local police and report it. We often hear about how on college campuses, students don’t report their rape because they know the campus police won’t do anything. If this is how you feel, then contact your local police to report. It is never the victim’s fault, ever.

If you have ever been a victim of rape or sexual assault and need guidance, contact National Sexual Assault Hotline at 1-800-656-4673.