10 Questions English Majors Never Want To Answer

10 Questions English Majors Never Want To Answer

Let's get metaphysical!


In a world of movers, shakers, and producers, the written word tends to be taken for granted. Sign here, initial there, write this way, sir or madam. Language creates and defines our reality or realities, but all too often it becomes our prison instead of our prism. English majors have the best (and sometimes worst) of both worlds, but when their asked these 10 questions, the book of life forces you to read between the lines.

1. You're an English major?


The question with the most audacity behind it without a doubt. To challenge the existence and purpose of an English major is beyond me. As if reading and writing were exclusive to anything and anyone else. Writers aren't in the business of first impressions, but we all know what that business model looks like: a long series of cubicles lined wall-to-wall with rejection letters. That's okay, English majors understand the need for math and science as well as faith and belief because they did their reading. How about you?

2. What do you write about?


Another broad question but just as necessary to ask. The answer tends to be limited by genre or even the type of writing you publish under, be it script writing or traditional writing for publishing houses. Even if you explain in detail what you write, they either fall on deaf ears or illiterate eyes. Concise, cookie-cutter language leaves writers intellectually starved, so throw us a bone and read a book and talk about it sometime. Better yet, learn the patience it's taken us to explain what we do to you so we don't make snap judgments about each other.

3. What are you going to do with that?


I don't know, maybe put words in people's mouths for a living like those actors in movies you adore so much. You didn't think they knew just what to say for every situation, did you? If I had a nickel for every time I heard that, I'd have a nickel. Get with the program people, writers write more than rhymes. There's a submission process and there's self-publishing but each process is its own beast. Here's a mantra that reassures us on what we're going to do: as long as there are books, there will be people who read them.

4. Where do you get your ideas?


Who knows, and if I did know, why would I tell you? Ideas don't always surge through us like a plug and a wire. Time, experience, hearsay, it's all greater parts to a great whole. They're no good until their written down anyway. Writers wait and seek and find the inspiration in the familiar and the unfamiliar. It sounds like a non-answer but an open-ended answer that's right up our metaphoric alley.

5. What have you written?


People always know how serious a writer you are by how much you've written. For you however, its quality far more than quantity and others only understand that if they've read any of your work. You show but all they want is tell. They don't trust that you have stories to tell but the truth is, you do. The only thing left to do is keep writing.

6. Are you published?


Publication equals success in the writer's world but it's not just about being syndicated. The goal is to be published but the portfolio, the works produced must be edited from cover to cover. Writing is hard work despite how effortlessly it comes off to readers and the process is never as simple as an interview for any other job. It is the road less traveled but the rewards are an endless road.

7. Do you like your job?


Besides the existential crisis, we like it enough to love it. Reading and writing saves us many a heartbreak too. The hours are good, the books are good, the writing is getting there, but for the most part we're in good company. The benefits of this job make it not a job at all. It makes your work your play.

8. What do you think about people reading less?


Excuse me, please, not while I'm reading. Really? Surveys have shown a decrease in the number of books read in America and I think it's a crime. I also think if people remain curious and care about knowing and knowing more, the need to read will be there. Our trust in technology is almost religious but it can never get in the way of the printed word. To the people who read less, books will never become obsolete because their will always be an analog urge to hold and use something in real time.

9. Where do you see yourself in five years?


Thank you for the extra layer of existential crisis. Five years? Can you make it ten? In that time, we can hope to be alive and healthy and not accepting burritos as a form of currency. Career goals aren't always that simple. We understand the importance of planning ahead but thinking so far in advance isn't a guarantee. We live in the present and are doing what we need to do now so that we can enjoy tomorrow. Now for my regularly scheduled nap in the pit of self.

10. Will you write me in to your book?


How do we answer this? We could say yes, but would they even read it to find out? English majors aren't liars, or maybe their the greatest liars we have. I don't know, but anything is possible. That murder victim, the one who asked too many invasive questions, sounds vaguely familiar. Nah, it's just your imagination.

English majors are known for answering their own questions but if you ask them about their lives off the page, you'll get a different story. Just make sure the questions make for a happy ending.

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I'm A Woman And You Can't Convince Me Breastfeeding In Public Is OK In 2019

Sorry, not sorry.


Lately, I have seen so many people going off on social media about how people shouldn't be upset with mothers breastfeeding in public. You know what? I disagree.

There's a huge difference between being modest while breastfeeding and just being straight up careless, trashy and disrespectful to those around you. Why don't you try popping out a boob without a baby attached to it and see how long it takes for you to get arrested for public indecency? Strange how that works, right?

So many people talking about it bring up the point of how we shouldn't "sexualize" breastfeeding and seeing a woman's breasts while doing so. Actually, all of these people are missing the point. It's not sexual, it's just purely immodest and disrespectful.

If you see a girl in a shirt cut too low, you call her a slut. If you see a celebrity post a nude photo, you call them immodest and a terrible role model. What makes you think that pulling out a breast in the middle of public is different, regardless of what you're doing with it?

If I'm eating in a restaurant, I would be disgusted if the person at the table next to me had their bare feet out while they were eating. It's just not appropriate. Neither is pulling out your breast for the entire general public to see.

Nobody asked you to put a blanket over your kid's head to feed them. Nobody asked you to go feed them in a dirty bathroom. But you don't need to basically be topless to feed your kid. Growing up, I watched my mom feed my younger siblings in public. She never shied away from it, but the way she did it was always tasteful and never drew attention. She would cover herself up while doing it. She would make sure that nothing inappropriate could be seen. She was lowkey about it.

Mindblowing, right? Wait, you can actually breastfeed in public and not have to show everyone what you're doing? What a revolutionary idea!

There is nothing wrong with feeding your baby. It's something you need to do, it's a part of life. But there is definitely something wrong with thinking it's fine to expose yourself to the entire world while doing it. Nobody wants to see it. Nobody cares if you're feeding your kid. Nobody cares if you're trying to make some sort of weird "feminist" statement by showing them your boobs.

Cover up. Be modest. Be mindful. Be respectful. Don't want to see my boobs? Good, I don't want to see yours either. Hard to believe, I know.

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My Journey With Divorced Parents

I realize now that things are better this way.


When I was about 4 years old, my parents got divorced. Now, I know that kids having divorced parents is not something that is uncommon at all. But everyone has a different experience and story to share.

Since my parents' divorce happened when I was at such a young age, I don't really have very many memories of them ever really living in the same house. Don't get me wrong, I have tons of childhood memories with my parents, but a vast majority of them are either with my mom or dad.

And I never really knew why they got divorced, aside from what they told me when I was older. It wasn't until my senior year that I really thought about what it was like for them to have to explain their situation to such a young kid. I'm not an only child, but my sister is four years older than me, so she had a bit more of an understanding. And my brother was just a toddler, so it wasn't much of an issue for him.

I think one of the hardest things to get used to was having to move cities when my mom got remarried. We moved from Overland Park, Kansas to Lee's Summit, Missouri. I was a very shy kid and absolutely hated the idea of having to change schools. It also made things even harder because my dad was still in Kansas, so everything I did revolved around my schedule of going between my mom and dad's houses. It eventually became a normal thing as time went on, and I got used to it.

Having your parents get divorced is a big adjustment for anyone, especially when it comes to them getting remarried. With my mom, she got remarried when I was in first grade and has been married ever since. He has a daughter just a few months older than my sister, and we all get along great. My dad got remarried around the same time as well, but ended up getting another divorce when I was 14 years old.

This is something that took a major toll on me, mentally and emotionally.

See, I was very close to my stepsister from my dad's second marriage. We were less than a year apart in age and got along insanely well. We did almost everything together. But after the divorce, she never talked to me again. I tried to keep in contact with her for some time, but eventually gave up when I never heard back. It gave me a lot of trust issues because family is the one thing people say will never leave.

After that, I struggled a lot with the idea of my dad dating. I was afraid to let them into my life because I knew that nothing was guaranteed, no matter what people told me. Because every time I even slightly started to let my walls down, something would happen and I put my defenses back up.

Eventually, my trust issues began to expand into relationships of all kinds. I was just afraid that people would leave and take a part of me with them and I hated the idea of that. It's still something I struggle with today. But as time went on, and I opened up to my dad about how I felt, things got easier. I realized it's okay to have a guard up when meeting new people, but that it's also okay to let them in at a pace that you control.

As I look back at my past today, I realized that everything I have been through because of my parents' divorce was meant to happen. I wouldn't be the person I am today if things had played out differently, and I'm thankful for the way things went. My mom is still happily married, and my dad is with someone who is absolutely perfect for him and I completely adore.

And I know that if my parents hadn't split, they would have never found the people they were meant to be with. I know I wouldn't have met certain people in my life that have made huge impacts on me in a multitude of ways. I wouldn't have gotten the chance to experience lots of the things I have throughout my life if things had gone differently.

We all just have to remember that everything happens for a reason. And I couldn't be more grateful for that.

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