Pugs, In Fact Drugs? | The Odyssey Online
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Pugs, In Fact Drugs?

Forget what you heard: Pugs are in fact drugs.

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Pugs, In Fact Drugs?
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Pugs are a breed of dog known for their squishy faces and stumpy legs. They waddle, you know. A popular meme has traveled far across the Internet in these recent years. The mantra "Pugs Not Drugs" rages across gifs, memes, T-shirts and from the lips and key taps of browsers of all ages.

What I'm here to convince you of today is that a good pug is much more than a dumb animal. You should remember what you've learned: Never trust what you read on the Internet. A pug could easily and convincingly be considered a drug.


I'll start with the Webster-Merriam definition of a "drug":

1drug

noun \ˈdrəg\
: a substance that is used as a medicine

Pugs are made of fur, love and varying chemicals, all of which are substances (you'll just have to trust me on the love part). When one is sad, the hugging of said combined substances can help alleviate sadness or pain. This constitutes these small mammals as a form of living medicine.

Exhibit A:


Further, I will go so far as to take the definition of a "recreational drug" to further clarify that pugs can be utilized as drugs:

recreational drug

noun


Definition of RECREATIONAL DRUG

: a drug (as cocaine, marijuana, or methamphetamine) used without medical justification for its psychoactive effects often in the belief that occasional use of such a substance is not habit-forming or addictive

So, although pugs don't fall within the examples listed, they are often used without a doctor's permission or justification for positive psychoactive effects (pugs have been proven to be mood-boosting for some people, to increase mental health and alleviate the burdens of stress and anxiety). Most dog owners begin to use pugs with the belief that they will not necessarily be forming a habit, only to find themselves in cycles of dog-loving.

The above pug is hidden within a blanket. A common theme in drug users is a desire to hide the source of their addictions. While they may lie in secret during the day, the drugs will often come out at night to help users fall asleep and take the edge off.


WARNING: The Following GIF Contains Graphic Imagery of Extreme Pug Addiction.

This news that the Internet has lied to you about the nature of pugs and drugs; but please, do not be alarmed. Denial is the first step. We've left that stage and are moving forward toward accepting the use of this newly defined drug. There are worse drugs to be addicted to. Most drugs will not love you back. Most drugs will not physically lick you (most, not all).

Most drugs are not pugs.

To end, I will leave you all with a haiku about pugs (Haiku is the poetic form much like these dogs: short and sweet).

The puggy-wuggy
Is a noble breed of dog,
Fuzzy love abounds. (Rapaport, Haikus 2015)
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