I Promise, Your Long Distance Relationship Is Going To Be Okay

I Promise, Your Long Distance Relationship Is Going To Be Okay

A list to calm your anxieties.

So to bring you up to speed, my boyfriend chose a co-op that resulted us being in a long distance relationship until July. Unfortunately this hasn’t been easy for either of us because we both have anxiety and being away from each other is proving to be quite difficult. If you know anything about us, you know we are extremely loving and extremely dependent on each other’s physical support. So as you can imagine, these 7 months have been, to be blunt, a tortuous hell. Here’s a list of things I’ve noticed while in this crazy endeavor.

1. You miss him more than anything else you’ve ever missed before.

My goofball has been gone from my side almost 5 months now and I can tell you it has been pure h-e double hockey sticks to the max.

2. You feel like you’re getting stabbed a million times.

Try to hang on, in the end, if it’s meant to be it will be, right?

3. Do your own thing.

I gave up on this once I changed jobs. Let me tell you, if you don’t do your own thing, you absolutely will be miserable.

4. When together, take all the pictures.

Print them out, or something, and make something with them. It’ll distract you, and make you feel better.

5. It is normal to not feel okay sometimes.

It’s okay to stay in your pajamas and cry. Just don’t do it everyday.

6. It is not the end of the world.

It may feel like your entire world is ending, but I promise you, it’s not. He will be back soon, and you will still have all the love.

7. It’s okay to feel clingy and annoying.

You love him, right? It’s okay to want to be with him 24/7.

8. Open and Honest Communication

Without it, you can misunderstand each other, and if you both have anxiety like my love and I do, it can make little misunderstandings turn in to big problems.

9. Support each other.

If you both have anxiety, you both need that support. I know for me, it means letting him rub his fingers in little circles on my shirt. For me, it’s leaning on his shoulder.

10. Don’t give up.

Seriously I know how hard it is to want to give up. I understand, but unless things seriously aren’t working, don’t give up just because of distance, or just because he or you has anxiety. It’s hard. I know. But don’t give up. You can do this. As long as you both try, it shouldn’t matter. All that matters in the end is that you love each other.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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Just Because I Check My Boyfriend's Location Every Hour Doesn't Make Me A 'Psycho Girlfriend'

No, checking his location every hour does not make me psycho.

My boyfriend and I have been seeing each other for a few months now. He has come up with describing my actions sometimes as “psycho girlfriend.” As much as this bothered me at first I started to realize there is nothing wrong with my “psycho” actions.

I don’t monitor who my boyfriend hangs out with and I don’t care who he texts, I trust him, but I do watch other things he does.

I probably check his location about once an hour, maybe more if he isn’t texting me back.

This isn’t some way for me to find out if he is with another girl, it’s so I can ensure he isn’t dead in a ditch somewhere. If he was on Snapchat five minutes ago but hasn’t texted me back in 45 minutes, yeah I’ll call him out on it but I'm not actually mad. If he is with friends and not answering me, it’s cool. I just want to be able to make sure I know where he is and that he is alive on a regular basis.

I make him keep his read receipts on for me.

I don’t care if he leaves me on read, I just need to know he is seeing what I’m saying. Half the time, I text him random facts or thoughts I have throughout my day, those don’t always need a response back. However, I do want to know he is acknowledging me through reading my texts.

Yes, from time to time I will spam him and make him respond to my messages so we can make plans or I can know what he is doing with his day but it’s not like I plan out his every move for him or care if he is getting drunk with the boys on a Wednesday, not my issue.

I don’t ask for all of his time or anything. I know he is a busy person. All I ask for him to text me back on a regular basis (once an hour to be exact), for him to allow for me to know where he is at all times and to get one night a week with him.

I don’t plan to show up where he is or anything, I simply just like to know information and get a weekly time with him. I don’t care if I only see him that one night a week, I just want one night with a movie or dinner or snuggles so I can get my boyfriend time.

The rest of the time he is his own person, and I couldn’t really care less about what he does in that time.

Cover Image Credit: Grace Wilkowski

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Be Proud Of Where You Come From

You wouldn't be the person you are today without the place you grew up.

Ever since I was little, I knew I wanted to get out of South Dakota and never really look back. I looked forward to the day where I could pack up all my things and move far, far away, but when that day finally came, it wasn't all that it's cracked up to be.

By no means do I regret moving to Michigan and going to my dream school. I love it more than I could have ever imagined, but being so far from my hometown makes me think about what my home state means to me and how it has shaped me into the person I am today, whether I like the idea or not.

When I tell people at school that I'm from South Dakota, they usually either look shocked or laugh. In high school, I would tell my friends that I couldn't wait to leave my small, boring and plain state, but now that I'm in college, I realize how much I actually love South Dakota.

Now, every time my friends in college make fun of South Dakota, I get the automatic instinct to defend it, which may seem silly, but it is the place I grew up and spent most of my life, so it is always going to be special to me.

I've learned to tell people that I'm from the largest city in South Dakota so that they don't ask questions about whether I have any neighbors, or if I have a buffalo wandering around. I have all these little fun facts to pull out on people if my home state ever needs defending, because the more time I spend away from South Dakota, the prouder I am that I was born in the heartland of America.

Being back home for the summer has reminded me so much of what it means to be a South Dakotan. I used to think that living and growing up in South Dakota limited my options and opportunities, but I know now that that is totally untrue. If anything, it taught me to make the most out of the small stuff. When I was given an opportunity, I knew they wouldn't come around too often so I learned that I had to seize it.

Another thing that I learned is that no one does kindness like South Dakotans, especially people from Sioux Falls. It is a city of nearly 200,000 people, so it's a

well developed area with just enough people that it doesn't feel like a small town, but you basically either know everyone personally or have heard their last name before. Everyone, and I mean everyone is kind, complimentary and has great manners. I have never been in another city where so many people ask how you are and truly mean it, hold the door and even just give a soft smile and wave to strangers.

There is so much more to South Dakota than meets the eye, and it will always hold a special place in my heart. Sioux Falls will always be my home. I will continue to defend it and cherish the memories I had there forever, even if I never move back because after all, it is where I grew up and it's where my family is.

Wherever you come from, be proud of it. I love my home state and will always be a proud South Dakotan.

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