I Promise, Your Long Distance Relationship Is Going To Be Okay

I Promise, Your Long Distance Relationship Is Going To Be Okay

A list to calm your anxieties.
421
views

So to bring you up to speed, my boyfriend chose a co-op that resulted us being in a long distance relationship until July. Unfortunately this hasn’t been easy for either of us because we both have anxiety and being away from each other is proving to be quite difficult. If you know anything about us, you know we are extremely loving and extremely dependent on each other’s physical support. So as you can imagine, these 7 months have been, to be blunt, a tortuous hell. Here’s a list of things I’ve noticed while in this crazy endeavor.


1. You miss him more than anything else you’ve ever missed before.

My goofball has been gone from my side almost 5 months now and I can tell you it has been pure h-e double hockey sticks to the max.


2. You feel like you’re getting stabbed a million times.

Try to hang on, in the end, if it’s meant to be it will be, right?


3. Do your own thing.

I gave up on this once I changed jobs. Let me tell you, if you don’t do your own thing, you absolutely will be miserable.


4. When together, take all the pictures.

Print them out, or something, and make something with them. It’ll distract you, and make you feel better.


5. It is normal to not feel okay sometimes.

It’s okay to stay in your pajamas and cry. Just don’t do it everyday.


6. It is not the end of the world.

It may feel like your entire world is ending, but I promise you, it’s not. He will be back soon, and you will still have all the love.


7. It’s okay to feel clingy and annoying.

You love him, right? It’s okay to want to be with him 24/7.


8. Open and Honest Communication

Without it, you can misunderstand each other, and if you both have anxiety like my love and I do, it can make little misunderstandings turn in to big problems.


9. Support each other.

If you both have anxiety, you both need that support. I know for me, it means letting him rub his fingers in little circles on my shirt. For me, it’s leaning on his shoulder.


10. Don’t give up.

Seriously I know how hard it is to want to give up. I understand, but unless things seriously aren’t working, don’t give up just because of distance, or just because he or you has anxiety. It’s hard. I know. But don’t give up. You can do this. As long as you both try, it shouldn’t matter. All that matters in the end is that you love each other.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

Popular Right Now

Stop Saying 'Love Is Love' And Then Shame Me For Dating A Republican

"How can you date a Republican?!" Quite easily, actually.

23250
views

"And love is love is love is love is love is love is love is love is love." Other theater geeks like me probably also remember this quote from Lin-Manuel Miranda's Tony acceptance speech in 2016. Now, thanks to Lin-Manuel and his talent for catchy phrases, every time someone says "love is love," all I can think of is Lin-Manuel's emphatic cry for equality.

This cry is one that I support wholeheartedly. I think that you should be allowed to love whomever you choose and that you should do so without fear of hatred or scrutiny. If you are a guy who loves guys, great. If you are a girl who loves girls, great. If you are a girl who loves guys and girls, great. You are born a certain way with certain sexual preferences, and there is nothing wrong with that.

However, if you believe that people should be free to love anyone they choose, then, honey, you better start looking past gender.

Let me tell you a little story.

Recently, I had a conversation with one of my closest friends about my boyfriend of almost 11 months. Somehow (and I'm shocked that this hadn't come up before), my boyfriend's political preferences became the topic of conversation.

The conversation went something like this:

"Wait, so is Tom a Democrat or Republican?"

"He's a Republican."

"WHAT?! Are you serious?"

"Yep."

"How can you date a Republican?"

After that, I basically went on a five-minute rant about how at the end of the day, his political preferences only make up a small fraction of who he is as a person and that I am not so shallow that I would be deterred by something this trivial.

At our cores, Tom and I value the exact same things: compassion, knowledge, kindness, dedication, honesty, respect, and above all else, love. Tom loves me unconditionally and I give him that same love in return; honestly, what else could I ask for?

Tom and I do get in some political arguments from time to time, but we also agree on those issues that are most important to me: female reproductive rights, marriage equality, and support for survivors of sexual assault. All of those things are non-negotiables for me, and Tom understands that and possesses his own list of non-negotiables.

Before you ask, yep, he voted for Trump. Did that take me back at first? Yes. Did I struggle to understand what would compel a person to vote for him? Absolutely. Did that thought kind of terrify me at first? Hell yes.

But you know what? After I just sat and listened to Tom's reasoning as to why he voted for him and watched him delve deep into Trump's policies, I could understand why some would vote for him. And to tell the truth, once I fell in love with Tom, none of that mattered anymore. And what is sad is that people so often fall so deep into their own echo chambers nowadays, that they wouldn't even give someone with different beliefs their ear. Well, I'm damn glad I did because Tom is the most amazing person I've ever met and I fall more in love with him every day.

So to tie this all together with a pretty little bow, if you're going to go around and preach that love is love and that everyone should be free to love whom they choose, then that shouldn't change for me. Maybe you're a Democrat that would never date a Republican or maybe you're a Republican who would never date a Democrat; that's your choice. But we don't get to choose who we fall in love with (much to the dismay of my liberal family and friends). Just keep an open mind and who knows? Maybe you could find some absolutely epic happiness.

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

How Starting Your Journey Is Half Of The Battle

"You can start your journey any day at anytime."

796
views

Not that long ago, I wrote an article about a little phrase I heard on my friend's snapchat story. It got a tone of views and a lot of great feedback. And just in time for the beginning of the new school semester, he said something else that just kind of stuck with me.

He said that you can start your journey any day, at any time.

Okay so we've all heard this before but have any of us actually taken the time to put that saying into action? Well, quite recently I have. I used to be the type of person who waited until last minute to do everything, whether it was homework, a workout plan or whatever I wanted to accomplish. I used to be the type of person who said that at whatever time I'll start my homework and if it was a minute past that time I would have to wait to the start of the new hour....yes like the meme.

But now, ever since I heard that quote, it's been replaying in my head on a loop. Which is why I now just do things at the moment they're thought of and not a certain time. I decided that this is the semester, I don't wait until the last minute to do all of my work, and so far it's going well. I decided that this is the perfect time to get in shape, and not wait until the New Year, because I'm the skinniest most out of shape person that I know. I decided that instead of waiting until the new year to eat healthier that I'm going to do it now.

For a while I have wanted to get back into dance. I kept saying that I'll sign up for classes again when I finish school. But instead I decided to do it now, registered for a ballet class at school and signed up for ballroom dance, and it hands down has been one of the best decisions I have made.

Honestly it's been weird not having a set start date and time for certain things, but why would I put off doing something that I want to do? What I will say though, is that not procrastinating on homework has made these first couple of weeks of the semester fly by and seem like a breeze.

Just by letting go of the idea that every thing needs to have a set start date and time and a set date and time to end has made the pressure of things go away. By just starting my journey for whatever I'm doing right now, has increased my happiness and my overall productivity of what I'm doing.

So a little word of advice just go for and just do whatever you want to do right now.

Related Content

Facebook Comments