Winter is coming, which means that the season of procrastination is upon us. Can you smell it in the air? The smell of desperation, strong coffee and cookies are wafting around your nose.
Let's face it, we all do it. We put off that paper until the very last moment because binge watching the new hit Netflix show is much more important. Seriously, anything on Netflix is much more important than writing that 15-page paper about Charlotte Brontë.
Suddenly, it's the night before your paper is due and you have the sudden realization that you can't just drop out of college and become the next billionaire. Maybe in another life. It's time to face the music and deal with that 10-page paper all about Nathaniel Hawthorne. Looks like you are about to pull an all-nighter. Grab that large cup of coffee and wish for a miracle cause you are going to need one or a few. All aboard the struggle bus, next stop is...well, there are no stops on the struggle bus. Sorry.
1. Where can I buy a time machine?
I should have started this paper ages ago but I'd rather be doing anything to not write this paper. Maybe I can steal a TARDIS and travel across time and space.
2. Google whether it is possible to write a 10-page paper in one night.
Thank you, Yahoo Answers, for the boost in confidence.
3. Attempt to write the introduction to your paper.
I don't even know where I'm going with this paper.
4. Netflix sounds like a good idea right now.
One episode won't hurt.
5. Reattempt to write the introduction to your paper.
The struggle is real right now.
6. Bam. 100 words down, 2400 to go.
It's the little things that help ease the struggle.
7. Ponder why you put yourself through this pain and torture.
I paid for this torture. What's wrong with me?
8. Ponder whether you can drop out of college and become an instant billionaire.
Gates and Zuckerberg did it. Maybe I can become Instagram or YouTube famous. My talk show "Whiskey Wednesday" will be a hit one day.
9. Somehow end up on YouTube watching One Direction interviews.
How did I get here? They have grown up so much these past few years. I'm not ready for this year long break.
10. Realizing it's 2 a.m. and you only have 500 words.
Can my fairy godmother appear right now and finish this paper for me?
11. Shifting into overdrive and feeling like a genius as your fingers fly across the keyboard.
This is the biggest load of bull crap that I have ever written.
12. Works Cited can be page 10 right?
Don't correct me. Let me have this moment.
13. The feeling when you struggle to type that last sentence in your paper.
My body aches and I can't see up or down. One more sentence and I will be free of this torture. Netflix calls to me.
14. Informing yourself that you won't ever wait until the last minute to write you paper again.
It's all just a lie that you tell yourself. You'll do it again. In fact, you got another paper due tomorrow. Yikes.
May the odds be ever in your paper.
