I have never been the type of person who knows what she is doing in her life. It still takes me a long time to just order food at my favorite restaurant. Should I get something new? Should I eat what I like? Am I missing out on something better?

So how does the world expect such an indecisive girl to be able to choose her career in a measly number of years?

They really shouldn't.

When I was a kid, I was the type of person who figured out life one step at a time. If I didn't know my topic for the Science Fair, I would figure it out the day before the deadline. If I didn't know how to make a diorama for my history project, I would conjure something up quickly and thoroughly.

But as I came to college, something changed. Everything was more than just school projects. The daunting word--the future--came into play. And then I felt scared of life rather than wanting to enjoy everything it was offering me. I looked at my peers and saw passion and determination, but I looked at myself and saw myself just searching for something. I wasn't sure what it was.

I began to call it my Quarter Life crisis. Don't get me wrong: I wasn't going to buy a sports car or something (Not that I had the money as a college student). But I did have a lot of questions:

1. What if I wasn't good enough to make it?

This was one of the harder questions that I wouldn't wish on anyone because when you think aren't good enough...well...you begin to believe it. You find yourself apologizing for things that were never your fault. That's a dangerous formula, especially in a time so sensitive as college when one bad friendship can cause you to feel so alone.

2. What am I supposed to do for the rest of my life?

If I had it my way, I would probably curl around my computer and watch the Food Network for the next twenty years instead of thinking about what I am supposed to do after I turn off my computer. The rest of a person's life... It's so unknown. For all we know, there isn't a tomorrow, so why are we constantly stressing about it today? What am I doing with my life? Well, I sure as heck am not going to worry about it constantly. Maybe I'll travel the world. Maybe I'll strive to end world hunger. Maybe I'll watch the Food Network. But isn't it supposed to be my choice, not society's to question?

3. Who am I doing this for anyway?

If the answer wasn't an astounding "FOR ME," then you were answering the wrong question. There was a long time in my life where I wasn't thinking about a future for me. I wanted for someone to be proud of me, to feel recognized for something, to be something special... But after a recent tragedy in my family and after losing my biggest motivator, I realized I wasn't doing any of it for me. When I lost the person who I was working so hard for, I didn't want to do ANYTHING. I realized months later that the only person worth doing anything for in this life is for yourself first and others second. Because if it's not something YOU want to do first, there will be a time where you won't want to do any of it and then you won't be there helping anyone.

4. Is this what I was meant to be/ do?

For this question, I am not going into the religious implications. I don't know if there was a grand plan or I make my own choices. But I do know that it doesn't matter. At the end of the day, I will just ask myself if I was a good person today, if I laughed, if I loved. My future occupation, whatever it may be, shouldn't deter from myself. I may not know exactly where I should I go, and I may even go in a wrong direction and regret it. But will I regret being someone who smiled through it all (as my personality tells me to do)? Probably not. Hopefully not.

5. I wish I could go back in time and do it right.

This isn't a question. But when you really think about it, it is. Regret is the biggest deterrent of my future. I am afraid to be wrong. I have always been. Even in middle school, I was afraid to raise my hand and answer a question because I was afraid to be wrong. So this is no different. I am worried about a future that I regret going toward. But the thing about regret is worse. I read an article once that people change many different careers before finding the right one. So why am I so afraid to be wrong when most people need to be wrong (even multiple times) to be right?

Honestly, the quarter-life crisis (should I even call it that, considering who's to say how long life even is? Nothing is guaranteed, except how we live the days we choose to live life) is all in my head. I feel the need to explain all my confusion when actually I just need to do what I do best. I need to figure it out one day at a time. So maybe I do take too long figuring out what I want to eat at my favorite restaurant and maybe I do question life too much. But perhaps this time, I won't be worrying about tomorrow but looking forward to it? I mean, isn't that the fun of it?