No prayer is a waste of time. No prayer goes unheard. Sometimes when we go to pray, it feels as if we are talking to ourselves. Sometimes it is not until we hear an answer from God that we realize our lack of faith. We pray for things, but often we don't expect answers. We pray, hoping for an answer, but we can sometimes forget we even prayed about it in the first place because our eyes are not open to see the little answers. We can get used to just praying for things and moving on, presenting God with a continual list of things that we seek. Keep offering it up! This is not bad. It is good to keep asking. We have to remind ourselves of how close God is to us, though, in the midst of it all.
Every prayer we pray He hears. If God hears every thought we ever think, would He not also hear every prayer we specifically direct toward Him? He is the One who waits for us. We are not the first ones to call; it is He who first draws us towards Him. It is His Spirit at work in us which moves us to pray. Thanks be to God! How can we doubt, then, if God really hears our prayers when He is the One who desires our hearts before we desire His?
Prayer is not about feeling something. It's not about whether we feel His presence or have something extraordinary happen. These beautiful consolations are good and are amazing gifts from God, but we cannot always have them. Prayer goes much deeper than any feeling we could experience. Prayer is a relationship. Beneath the beautiful signs of God's love, which we may sometimes experience, is a more lasting gift. It is our personal relationship with Him. It is just like any other relationship we know. When a man and a woman first begin to date each other, everything is beautiful. Everything is new and exciting, and their hearts are bubbling with joy and new love. Soon, though, the feeling fades, as they know each other more and more. They go through ups and downs together, and it gets more serious. It's no longer about those initial beautiful feelings. They are going deeper into their relationship together. Although they face challenges, they are growing closer to each other through them. If they had only remained in the initial stage of their feelings, they would never be able to reach a more intimate level in their relationship.
The same goes for our relationship with God. Just like any other relationship, it cannot always be just hearts, blue skies, and sunshine. It is when we have that hand to hold through the struggles that we grow closer to someone. It is when we know the deepest pains within someone's heart and when we can walk with them that we grow closer. It is when we can lean on someone's shoulder for support that we are made stronger and grow deeper in our relationships. We grow deeper in the dark.
When we are in the dark and cannot seem to grasp where God is, He is there holding us in the palm of His hands. When we pray, knowing that He is listening, but cannot shake the fact that our senses and feelings seem to be telling us something different, He is there, wiping our tears away. Do not let your senses fool you! We have faith, but sometimes it is not strong. If it were, we would not be surprised to hear an answer.
I know someone who recently experienced this in her prayer life. She was praying and asked Jesus if she could see His love for her through others. She continued praying about other things, but a minute later, her friend beside her put his hand on her shoulder and said, "Jesus says he loves you." She was very grateful, but at first she thought this was a response to something else she had been praying about, until she remembered that she had prayed just a moment ago for the grace to see Jesus' love for her through others. When she realized this was an answer to her prayer, she was amazed. It is amazing how God really does hear every single prayer. Yet, why are we so amazed? Shouldn't we know that He will answer?
Venerable Fr. Solanus Casey was a very holy man who remembered Jesus' words, "All things for which you pray and ask, believe that you have received them, and they will be granted to you" (Mark 11: 24). He encouraged people to "thank God ahead of time," completely confident that God would answer their prayers. When I receive an answer to my prayers, my mind is opened up to the depth of which God hears me, to the true reality of it. I am filled with thanksgiving for God's goodness, His love, His faithfulness in answering, and for the blessings of the gifts he bestows on me through His answer. Yet, I do not have to wait to hear His answer before I rejoice and give thanks! God is unchanging. If He was faithful in answering us once, He will most certainly answer us every time. His love, guidance, and blessings never fail nor end. This is the challenge–to recognize that we are talking to God, not ourselves, and that He hears every prayer and will answer every prayer.
Jesus' disciples struggled with this challenge, too. One night, while in their boat, the disciples saw a figure approaching them on the water. "They were terrified, and said, 'It is a ghost!' And they cried out in fear" (Matt 14: 26). If they had expected Jesus to be able to walk on water, they would not have been afraid. They would have spared themselves from fear and would have had the comfort of peace. They did not recognize God's glory until after Jesus invited Peter to step out on the water and walk on the waves himself. After this, "those who were in the boat worshiped [Jesus]" (Matt 14: 33). If only the disciples had accepted who Jesus really was when they first saw him. Then, they would have seen his glory and given thanks from the start. Every time we pray, we have the same opportunity to accept God for who He is, a loving and faithful Father, and to glorify Him and give thanks from the very beginning are confident in His goodness and blessings.
God will always answer, just in His own time. Fr. Solanus said, "God is constantly planning wonders for the patient and the humble," so we can surely ask for the graces of patience and humility in waiting to hear His answers. Sometimes God knows that we have to wait a little longer before we hear his answer with clarity in just the way we need to. In the meantime, silence is not the sign of His departure. It is a sign of His very closeness to you. Through the silence, He tells you He loves you and has a plan for you, even if you are not ready to see what it is yet. He lets us stay blinded at times so that we can learn to walk in trust with Him, yet He will never leave our sides to let us go astray.
