I grew up a part of a different family than the one I am in now. My biological family didn’t see me as a priority in their lives. Instead, they put drugs, alcohol, and sex above me. I wasn’t aware that I wasn’t the most important thing in their lives; I was a child and believed what they told me. I had a mother who was absent-minded and oblivious to my needs as her daughter, I didn’t know who my father was, and the rest of my family acted as my mother did towards me. From the time that I was eight, until I was 12, I was in and out of foster and group homes. I went back and forth between being with my biological family to being in those unfamiliar homes. To say the least, for a short period of time my life was unstable.
During those few years of my life, I built up a lot of hate. I hated my mother for doing drugs and paying more attention to the next man she was going to sleep with than she did to me. I hated the Department of Family and Children Services (DFACS) for taking me from the only family I knew. I hated my house-parents for acting like they knew more than me. I hated whoever was the person who created me (I didn’t believe in God at the time) for giving me such a crappy life. I had so much hate in my heart that I left no room for anyone to come into my life and make me love them, or so I thought.
I met this amazing couple while I was at the last group home I lived in. They loved my sister and me from the beginning. I, however, was a little wary (OK, very wary) of them. I wasn’t ready to lose this whole family I just grew up a part of, and I had no idea what would happen if I said yes to being adopted by them. Long story short, my sister convinced me to try it. So, on Dec. 22, 2008 my full name changed and so did my life. You see, I’m the type of person who just jumps in the water instead of sticking my foot in to test the temperature (literally and figuratively; I’m a water bug). The moment I decided that my answer was going to be yes, I started to love Mr. Clay and Mrs. Beth as my parents. Soon I would start calling them Mommy and Daddy and start to believe that they were just that: honest, loving parents who wanted to give me a better life.
Adoption isn’t just a piece of paper; it isn’t an experiment. Sometimes it fails, and sometimes it succeeds. My story is one that exceeded all expectations because everyone told my parents it was going to be hard and not to expect my sister and me to ever commit to them fully. When you look at my family, you will find that we are by no means perfect, but you can tell that it was the will of God that brought us together. Adoption is for kids from foreign countries, it’s for babies, and it’s for the twelve and fourteen-year-old girls who need a home just as much as anyone else. God works in mysterious ways, and because of that I have the family I wished for every Christmas, I have opportunities that are bountiful, I have relationships that have lasted what seem a lifetime, I have a beautiful mother that I eerily resemble, and I know my earthly and Heavenly Father. Adoption is a powerful tool that can change someone's life in ways they never thought possible.
